MR. GASSAWAY: [RE: Letters, Aug 31, in which Mr. Gassaway criticizes a previous letter to the editor written by this letter's author, which described various things seen on N Killingsworth at 4 am, and which Mr. Gassaway perceived as racist.] If you're not tolerant enough to realize that it's actually okay to laugh a bit at the world around us, and if you can't pause once in a while and pull your head out of that dark, private place of yours without screaming "Racism!" over a comical approach to one person's view of her own community—then surely you are the most ignorant of us all. Yes, there really are "gangstas" roaming the Killingsworth corridor, and yes there really are drug dealers hiding out in doorways late at night, and yes Jefferson High School really is 66 percent black and has an alarming dropout rate. What's that? Clueless? Racist? Yo G, I beg to differ, man—I'm one of those "colored folk" myself.

Lux "Tar Baby" Nunchucks


DEAR MERCURY: Scott Moore's article "Yellow Bikes: Version 2.0" [News, Aug 31] describes the original Yellow Bike Project as a failure. Three times he uses the word "failed." Give me a break! The free yellow bikes were a social experiment. We painted 10 bikes yellow and put them on the streets. The media picked up on it, and away it went. Multnomah County helped with some warehouse space. Metro supplied a small grant. The Community Cycle Center helped with parts and mechanics. The City of Portland did not help us, and we never asked them for help. We received letters from all over the world. It helped Portland re-enforce its reputation as cool and goofy. After three years and over 3,000 bikes, we burned out. The project faded away. We are glad to read the city is looking at a new version and wish them good pedaling.

Tom O'Keefe and Joe Keating

Co-founders of the Yellow Bike Project


DEAR PORTLAND MERCURY: As a hapless imbecile, I am writing to beg you to never, ever, ever remove Frank Cassano's Imbecile Parade from your paper again [New Column, Aug 24]. This week you used that space to congratulate your softball team... what the fuck? Is that more important than rescuing blithering imbeciles from themselves and others? NO! Your paper is full of well-written articles regarding current issues nationally as well as locally, and your coverage of the arts scene can't be beat, but the Imbecile Parade is your most valuable contribution to the community. Did you not realize this? Perhaps it is because you are all IMBECILES!

Calina Ide


DEAR MERCURY: Congratulations! I can't believe the Mercury is the best softball [team] in the world! Was it just a slow news week in Portland, or is the Mercury collectively that self-absorbed that you think readers CARE what your beer-league softball team does? Nobody gives a shit.

Drew Biedermann


DEAR MERC—In response to your article of a couple weeks back ["Yells Like Teen Spirit," News, Aug 31] about flash mobs of teen suburbanites hell-bent on destruction, as well as the response from Travis ("Please be nice—I can't stand the hate!") [Letters, Sept 7], I would like to say that I would PAY MONEY to be able to throw bottles at the heads of these bratty little shit lickers. I lived in the Rosefriend Apartments until they closed the building in July—the very last night of our tenancy one of these mobs broke into the building and wrecked the place, spray painting, kicking in doors to apartments with people still living in them, and pouring beer on everything. To top it off, the little pukes PISSED ON EVERYTHING I HAD LEFT IN MY APARTMENT AND STOLE MY BEST COAT. I am looking forward to the day someone beats the crap out of these rich, spoiled, over-privileged douchebags before shipping them off to prison where they will each get to have their very own "special friend."

Alexis TurnerCONGRATULATIONS... ER... CONSOLATIONS to Alexis for winning the Letter of the Week with her horrid tale of urination and theft! While we don't have any winter coats to spare, we'll happily hook you up with two tickets to the Laurelhurst Theater and $30 to No Fish! Go Fish!, who probably shouldn't serve you anything that comes in a bottle.