Savage Love

See Turtles

Comments

1
"YES, YOU ADDRESS IT! IMMEDIATELY!"

Ah, dan living in alternate reality-land, I see.

"So you say it without hesitation, without concern for his feelings, and you say it as you leap out of bed and reach for your shirt, pants, car keys, and phone."

Or, you just pass on it, and have a mature conversation about it afterwards. What are you, 12 this week Dan?
2
Pts, perhaps YOU'RE more tolerant of someone else's shitty nasty ass right in YOUR face. But most folks aren't quite as open-minded.
3
Mr. Savage is totally off with his advice to Mired in the Mud. i've been in a similar situation. Thankfully not ass, but pretty bad nonetheless. i said nothing for a long time, until i realized that if i didn't let him know that there was a problem, the next girl that he was with might not be too kind. So, i very kindly & compassionately let him know that something foul was going on & he needed to pay extra attention to that area. His pride was a bit wounded, but he got over it. And the problem was solved. If i had freaked the fuck out like Dan suggests, he would have been crushed & traumatized.
We all have bodies, & all of our bodies excrete. i don't tear myself up for having excretions, so why would i do that to someone else? Particularly in a relationship. A little humor, compassion & communication go a long way.
4
I don't think Dan was advising that she "freak the fuck out" on the guy - only that she BE ASSERTIVE and direct and immediate about the situation. I mean, if this guy can't WASH HIS ASS thoroughly - whether he's with someone or not - then someone SHOULD be stern with him. For alot of folks, this is a "running out the door" deal-breaker, so it's amazing she even put up with it for soo long.

I feel that Dan was 100% spot on with THIS one. The whole thing just sounds nauseating.
5
Be polite and appropriately put-out the first time. "Uh...I hate to say this, but you need to take a shower and clean up a bit. This is a bit nasty." Because you say you really like this guy, he deserves the consideration.

If he's got any sense, he'll take the hint and that'll be the end of it.

If it happens again, run for the hills.
6
@5~ i agree, but...This person is saying that there was a turd poking out of his butt. i find that to be, um, highly unlikely. If there was, dude must have been on some serious liquor, or crack, or...whatever. A poop doesn't just present itself like that.
Also ~ so, what? does everyone know when 69 is going to occur? And hence, we all check our butt for evidence of our humanity? i do my best to maintain, but really? i am going to be called out for having toilet paper sticking to a hair? i would expect that in the context of a relationship, my lover would say nothing to ruin the moment, but he would mention afterwards that i had some cling-on's. Big fucking deal!

@Damos~ You sound like a drag to have sex with! i bet you want your women hairless & thin, too. Geeze!
7
Look, i like to think i'm more liberated than MOST people. Had the subject matter been ANYTHING ELSE (mostly anything else), i'd take a more kind 'n gentle approach. But we're talking about SHIT here. I'm sorry, that's a total deal-breaker for me - and i would hope for most other people.

At the very least, it shows cleanliness and that you have consideration for the person you [might potentially] get with. Just wash your butt and make sure there's no toilet paper, that's all. I don't think that makes me a Nancy Reagan.

Besides, don't people tend to freak out or be permanently turned off over things faaar less?

I'm NO drag, btw.
8
" Just wash your butt and make sure there's no toilet paper, that's all. I don't think that makes me a Nancy Reagan. "
Now i know. And knowing is half that battle. Thank You!
9
Damosa, you do realize that every time you fart and smell the odor, you are putting actual fecal molecules within your nose, throat, and lungs?
10
Sure i realize that. That's why i don't pass gas - or "fart" as you so vulgarly put it. And i try not to walk behind people, either. Humans, for the most part, are beastly pigs. This happens to be the case REGARDLESS of physical attractiveness, gender, etc.

I know i'm no different, yeah. That's why i always wash, shave, condition, brush, cleanse, scrub, and do what i can to keep the nastiness at bay. It's a never-ending battle, sure. But short of paying a professional nurse/dom, noone's going to wash my ass for me.
11
I find this entire thing hilarious and kind of a turn on. I guess I really am the nice girl who does the weird stuff.
12
Ok, Damos ~ Now, you don't have bodily functions like every other animal on this planet? And you furiously try to eradicate all traces of your humanity? Why are you having a constant "battle" with your body? Why not accept, even relish, what you are? You can slice yourself up, as can i, &...well, you know. So, blood is good, but all other excretions or functions are bad? Go listen to Coil & get back to me.
13
I DO listen to Coil, actually! Why thank you.
14
You don't fart?! You will spontaneously combust if you are not careful. Fact. What if this guy was just shoving milk duds up his own ass and left this lucky lady a sweet caramely treat to excite during a spirited round of 69? We never really know. If I am prarie doggin (turtle head is just sooo vulgar) I am usually in the early stages of a shit in which case I need the Mercury quick to wipe my ass with, not someone with a mouthful of my penis. Though that might be kind of cool, too. Whatever.
15
I think I'd buy and leave baby wipes in his bathroom, in hopes he got the message MITM.