Should I Be Alarmed?

Many people go through life even-tempered and reasonable. These people are NOT WELL. Sometimes, it is appropriate--even desirable--to panic. But when? Want to know when you should be concerned? Take this easy true/false quiz and find out. Good luck!

T F My car's "brake fluid" indicator light has been on for three weeks.

T F My cat's feline leukemia test came back inconclusive.

T F I've started watching McMillan and Wife on the Hallmark channel.

T F I've been to the comic book store four out of the last five weekends.

T F I have an unexplained rash that alternately burns and tickles.

T F I think my best friend is stealing my ideas and selling them to Everybody Loves Raymond.

T F My psychiatrist's voice mail is full.

T F Last weekend I drank seven cocktails in two hours.

T F Last weekend I drank seven cocktails in two hours and drove home.

T F The next day I did not feel hung over.

T F When I think about Dark Angel, I feel funny.

T F I bought advance tickets to see Pirates of the Caribbean.

T F I'm going to see Phish play in the Gorge with my boyfriend and his FATHER.

T F I've started brushing the dog's teeth.

T F I think I may have accidentally brushed my teeth with the dog's toothbrush.

T F I have over six pints of Tofutti in the freezer right now.

T F Four pints are half-eaten.

T F I've started writing poetry.

T F I've been menstruating for thirty-six days.

T F I work in an office.

Did you answer "true" to ten or more of the above? You should be alarmed at your situation. You are in serious trouble, my friend. Action to remedy your condition should be taken immediately. Do not delay. People who should be alarmed often get along well with EMTs and Dalmatians. They do not get along well with nuns who win the lottery.