THURSDAY, MARCH 27
8:00 CW SMALLVILLE
Season finale! Brainiac returns to eff with Clark's family; Clark decides to eff him right back!
9:00 CW REAPER
Season finale! A jealous spirit wants to kill women who are prettier than she is. (No, it's not Sarah Jessica Parker.)
FRIDAY, MARCH 28
9:30 VH1 FREE RADIO
Season finale! Lance Krall stars as a dumbass radio shock jock in one of the funniest improv shows of the year!
10:00 SCIFI BATTLESTAR GALACTICA
Interviews and clips of the first three seasons get you caught up for next week's big season premiere!
SATURDAY, MARCH 29
CBS ROBOCOP 2—Movie
(1990) Detroit's favorite tin-can cop returns to open up a can of mechanized whup-ass on dirty politicians!
SUNDAY, MARCH 30
FOX THE SIMPSONS
Homer shares his most precious secret with Bart: his beef jerky manufacturing lab.
Serial killer Dexter doesn't appreciate it when other murderers cut into his territory. GET IT?!?
MONDAY, MARCH 31
ABC DANCING WITH THE STARS
Here's a question: Why don't they let Marlee Matlin's interpreter dance instead?
The series where recording artists share how they created their songs continues tonight with Snoop Dogg. AWESOME.
TUESDAY, APRIL 1
8:00 CW BEAUTY AND THE GEEK
The beauties must construct science projects. Ooh! I hope they do a "Botox volcano"!
9:00 FOX HELL'S KITCHEN
Season premiere! One of the contestants goes missing on the first day of competition (I'd say the smartest one).
WEDNESDAY, APRIL 2
8:00 CW AMERICA'S NEXT TOP MODEL
The models participate in a photo shoot where they lay face down in water. Breathe deeply, girls!
FOX THE MOMENT OF TRUTH
Season finale! In the final episode, host Mark L. Walberg reveals that lie detectors are bullshit.