Marc Byrne
From XV
15 SW 2nd

XV is only like one of the biggest pick up spots on the planet, so Mark sees dating disasters all the time. And I do mean all the time. But especially on the weekends. Here's what not to do if you have any hope of getting laid in 2004. At least by anyone you might consider laying twice. Common mistakes, all of them:

-- Don't get too drunk: "Sloppy is never pretty."

-- Don't try to impress: "If your date needs to be impressed, go out with someone else."

-- Don't be too serious: "It's boring."

-- Don't try to fuck in the XV walk-in: "Thank you"

-- Don't act like an ass: "See all of the above."

Sheila Baraga
From the Sapphire Hotel
5008 SE Hawthorne

Maybe you have your wardrobe in tip-top style, and your karaoke skills are watertight. So what, I bet you still suck at dating. It's an area we all could improve in, whether we want to admit it or not. And hey, Sheila Baraga's Sapphire Hotel is one of Portland's top date spots, so she's like an expert on this shit:

-- Do be fearless: "Go ahead and ask... preface a dating invitation with a compliment or two. Be direct and smile. Confidence is very sexy!"

-- Do pay: "If you're the one that did the asking then you should always pay (guy or girl)… even if it means trading your Maker's for Pabst."

-- Do try to dress with a little STYLE: "Make it feel special and chances are it will be (better to over than under dress)."

-- Do confirm: "Call on the day of the date to establish some connection and lessen the tension."

-- Do keep looking: If you don't have anyone to date, come down to the Sapphire Hotel on Wednesday nights (after 8 pm) and I'll help you out."