Pardon my put-the-lotion-in-the-basket headline, but how can anyone not be in complete awe of Carl Newman? The gingered frontman of the New Pornographers lives the sort of existence that any of us would (rightfully) kill for. In addition to his stellar solo work under the name A.C. Newman, being one of the great modern songwriters, having the best promo photo ever, and hanging with Neko Case whenever he damn well pleases, it turns out that Newman also owns a home on an artist colony where he makes his own maple syrup. Dear god, that man has it all.

To summarize: Carl Newman lives the perfect life and eats hotcakes for every meal. So jealous.