Man, just look at the intimidating legal warning (the fingerprint graphic is a nice touch, makes me feel like I'm a sex offender registering when I move into a new neighborhood). It's alarming that a warning this threatening accompanies an unsolicited CD, one that just randomly shows up in my mail pile amidst countless other friendlier submissions.

Regardless, an album with such strident legal demands must be important, nay, essential. This truly is a recording that will shape our generation and change the very face of music forever.

Oh, never mind.