'as a college student, but not as an adult'

chuckle

Ugh, canvassers. One of the most effective ways I've found to deal with the ones that catch you from a block away with a OMG HI HOW ARE YOU? is to turn it back at them and then be like HOLY SHIT YOU ARE NOT MY FRIEND. FUCK. GOOD-BYE.

Also, I hate canvassers

^ Working for OSPIRG was fucking awful too. Besides some general weirdness, I made $90 for TWO WEEKS OF WORK. This was back in 1997 thouh

I have no idea of what they were doing was legal in Oregon. I do know we were commission only. :/ To this day, I won't donate to a PIRG.

(There was a lawsuit against WashPIRG about the same time, we ended up getting a small settlement out of that one after we did some canvassing in Seattle.)

When i first moved here, my very first job was doing door-to-door for OSPIRG. I had NO idea what i was getting myself into! The job description was vague enough that i assumed it was some sort of in-house sales gig - which i've done before. Frankly, i've never even heard the word "canvassing" regarding what it's known for before moving to Portland. Back in GA, it always was just called "door-to-door". $80 - as of 2005, that was the minimum daily quota. MOST people will not sustain that - no matter how young, pretty, and disgustingly up-beat you are.

I lasted two weeks - which apparently is a week longer than the average hire. Very miserable, demoralizing work, it is. Left out there in some rich-fuck neighborhood for 4-6 hours at a time. If you HAVE to use the bathroom, your choices are:

1. Ask a potential giver if you could use theirs (after asking them for money - AWKWARD!).

2. Find some bushes.

3. Hold it as best you can.

If you're lucky you might end up near a school that's open, and you can go there. But don't count on it. Canvassing for OSPIRG will typically have you out in the West Hills or some other upper-middle class area where's you're literally miles away from the nearest store or bus stop.

And not that i'm bashing on OSPIRG, 'cause i'm really not. They ARE legit and theirs is a great cause. But damn, the job itself! I just wish there were a better way of doing it.

I wonder if the canvassers, or their supervisors, ever considered that less pushiness might, in some cases, equal more donations? That whole tactic where they lock eye contact with you from half a block away -- that pisses me off. That's an automatic no. If these kids with clipboards would tone down the zeal and be less smarmy, they might actually get me to stop and listen to them for a few moments. If not, my 5 dollars is going to the guy with the cardboard sign. And least then I'll know exactly where the money is going.

I thought you were going to tell us how much money went to the organization as opposed to the overhead including hiring these people to canvas. Also, if I give my credit card info to some tiny coed on the streets, is there any chance that that info might wind up somewhere it's not supposed to go? Either because somebody knocks her over and takes it, or the canvassers are themselves desperate for cash. Not that I would ever give money to these people, so it's a moot point.

Before I leave Portland, I want an opportunity to tell a Greenpeace canvasser to go fuck a polar bear.

@9. Good point. Especially considering the high turnover rate of these canvassers, just another reason to not give out credit card information on the street.

And I just want to point out, for my own liberal peace of mind, I fully support giving to non-profits and donating to charities, but on my own terms, on my own time, and in a way that I feel is both secure and legitimate.

@seanpdx I'm going to carry around a copy of the ACLU Amicus brief on how corporations are people to hand out to that particular group. Here you go dickbags! This is what you're actually canvassing for.

Also, Nazis.

I worked for Grassroots during the fall 2010 election cycle. We only went to the homes of registered voters with spotty voting records and reminded them to make sure to vote (for Kitzhaber in particular). No money, no guilt, just vote. The only turnoff for me in the six weeks I canvassed was when one of the higher-ups of the operation gave us a pep-talk one day and called Chris Dudley an "idiot meat-head jock." This guy was a Willamette University graduate while Dudley holds a degree from fucking Yale. Before leaving us to work he implored us to become Facebook friends with his Black Lab dog. Other than that I have fond memories plus I could make my own hours which was a plus seeing as how I took it on as a second job to pay off my Visa card.

I've always liked the British term "chuggers," which is short for "charity muggers."

I lasted approximately one week as a canvasser, being one of the many clueless people lured 20 minutes out of college by "SUMMER JOB TO PROTECT ____, $X-$Y/hr!"

If you want to meet a lot of really fun people, it's pretty good in my single experience - I'm still good friends with many of the people I worked (and drank) with, at what I assume was OSPIRG.

Essentially ask yourself: would I be cool with going door to door selling vaccuum cleaners, and maybe selling one in a full day of walking (a shocking amount of walking)? If the answer is yes and you like boozing + the environment, sign up today.

While I still don't give money on the street or doorway (we give monthly online to various causes/orgs), I'll often let these people practice their pitches. Because I'm a sap sometimes.

The HRC is a sham, it exists for the advancement of bourgeois White gay men and lesbians.

THE IDEA OF CLIFTON BROOKS COMING TO MY HOUSE AND ASKING FOR MONEY IS TERRIFYING. I'M NEVER ANSWERING THE DOOR AGAIN.

The salient fact missing from this article is that canvassing companies take a percentage of the charitable donations. After the Do-Not-Call list went into effect several years ago, a lot of telemarketing companies transitioned to soliciting donations on behalf of charities.

If these canvassing companies work on the same percentages, the actual charities see only around 20% of the donation money. The other 80% goes towards ensuring that every goddamn street corner in Portland has a shill with a clipboard waiting to harass people.

TL;DR: Stop giving people money on the street. If you're feeling philanthropic, make a mental note and donate directly to the charity on their website.

@Graham buzzer4life

I worked for one day fundraising door to door for an environmental group in Portland when I was 20 or so and I quit at the end of the shift even though broad hints were dropped that there were occasional orgies in the van. Not sure if that still goes on, this was THE EIGHTIES!!!

No orgies, just underpaid and either pranked or someone seriously tried to recruit me into monkey wrenching. Fucked. Up.

I gnaw at the heels of canvassers. Bunch of annoying Aholes.

Also, why has nobody reported on the rampant fox attacks in Newberg!? Our town is inundated with foxes and nobody seems to care. Where did they come from?

Also, follow @Squirrelchat if you like humor on the twitterz

Haha your twitter is hilarious, Squirrelbaby

Glad the Merc did this article. Well written too. I'm not keen on the "get in your face" canvasser technique, I've stopped for the "Could I talk to you about X?" approach twice, and ended up signing up for one. The "How are you today?" is a bad approach, because , let's face it, you don't care how I am today...you need me to commit, so honesty is a worthy approach. The one canvasser who deserves the "Nice try but you're an asshat"award goes to some lady in Sellwood who's pitch was something like "So, can you sleep at night knowing that ____" to which I said "No, but thanks for the insomnia" and as I walked away started insulting me. So, by implication, she, who knows nothing about me, my income, my own charitable giving...she gets to be on the street and say what she wants? Yes, she does, cuz that's the first Ammendment. And because of that same law, I'm calling her an asshat. Thank you.

I don't want to talk to canvassers anymore than anyone else, but people who are verbally abusive to them are scum. I've seen the most casual non-in-your-face variety get screamed at by some sociopath. They don't get paid enough, by a humongous margin, to put up with that kind of abuse. They may be annoying to you, but they're doing their job, one they wouldn't be doing if they didn't need income.
As for the ACLU supporting free speech for neo-Nazis: of course. If you're not in favor of free speech for neo-Nazis, then you're not in favor of free speech, period. But I would personally never donate to the ACLU again because the way they've worked to expand corporate rights actually threatens human rights.

Reading comprehension

Complete sentences

@iceprez Watch your dirty whore mouth. Willamette University is the Harvard of the west.

Call WU what you want, it does not change the fact that this guy wanted us to be fb friends with his black lab dog

I like to keep it simple for folks like you geyser.

People like me think you don't have to try.