All right, sportos—the Super Bowl's this Sunday! But while you're stocking up on dip and wagering on the Seahawks, think about it: What does the Super Bowl offer that blockbuster films can't deliver? Janet Jackson's breast? Please! Here are four football movies that have more testosterone in their opening credits than this year's Super Bowl will serve up in an entire first half.

Black Sunday (1977)—A foxy Israeli anti-terrorist double agent (Marthe Keller) attempts to stop—or is she helping?—an angry Vietnam War POW (Bruce Dern) who has hijacked the Goodyear Blimp and plans to smash it into the stadium during the Super Bowl!

The Last Boy Scout (1991)—Tony Scott directs Damon Wayans' venture out of In Living Color and into dramatic (and very bloody) high action. Bruce Willis plays a down-and-out ex-Secret Service agent who is drawn into a mystery after a stripper (a then-unknown Halle Berry) is murdered. But the plot's incidental: The film plays out like some dark male fantasy as professional football games dissolve into gun battles and mobsters are chop sueyed by helicopter blades.

The Sum of All Fears (2002)—We'd all be better off if Ben Affleck had hung it up after his best role ever: a fledgling CIA agent who's the only person in the world who knows that the Russians were actually not behind a nuclear bomb exploding during half time at the Super Bowl. Will he be able reach the president in time and stop him from starting World War III?

The Longest Yard (1974)—Not the crappy Adam Sandler remake: Burt Reynolds stars as a former NFL superstar who is now biding his time behind bars in a state penitentiary. (He was actually nominated for a Golden Globe for this film!) For some cooked-up reason, the warden demands that Reynolds fields a football team of the ragtag convicts against a team of the sadistic guards. Great, bone-crunching performances from real NFL stars like the Packers' middle linebacker Ray Nitschke. PHIL BUSSE