Summertime Fun Flix

"Summa, it turns me upside-down... Summa Summa Summa... it's like a merry-go-round." So spoketh Ric Ocasek, and we all wept. Summer is a time for sun, summer is a time for fun, summer is a time to get naked on an island and sleep with multiple partners... n'est pas? I challenge you to watch these shining examples of summer excess, and for gawd sakes try not to get sand in yer crack, it's so uncomfortable.

Summer Lovers (1982)--Who doesn't love a good threesome once in a while? That's the question posed by writer/director Randal Kleiser in his follow up to Grease and The Blue Lagoon. Michael (young and humpy Peter Gallagher) and Cathy (young humpette Daryl Hannah) travel to the Greek Isles for some summer fun, '82-style. But trouble in paradise erupts when Michael starts to diddle around with Lina, a French archeologist. Cathy finds out and soon they are all in bed together making happy. Actually, to give this film a little justice, it is quite engaging, very sexy and beautifully photographed. Dare I call it a forgotten gem? Yes, I dare!

Corvette Summer (1978)--Post-Star Wars, pre-face mangling car wreck, Mark Hamill is a high school kid who loves him some cars, 'specially the tricked out Corvette his auto shop class has been working on all year. Then some baddies steal it, so Mr. Mark goes after 'em. On his cross-country travels, he meets a very young prostitute played by future Designing Woman Annie Potts. This is a true drive-in classic, kind of dumb, a little sweet, but all bitchin'.

One Crazy Summer (1986)--I'm sorry to bring this movie back into the vernacular. I know, it was safely stowed away in the dark greasy crevices of your brain, and now you're like, "Oh yeah, that movie was funny!" Well, like most things you think you remember, you are only half-right. John Cusack, Demi Moore, Bobcat Goldthwait, and Booger from Revenge of the Nerds must pull together to win a big boat race in order to help save Demi's big old house from being destroyed by the bad preppie assholes. This has USA Up All Night written all over it. Where's Gilbert Gottfried when we need him? Oh yeah, doing voice-overs for Subway commercials.

The Endless Summer (1966)--A sports film for people who don't particularly like sports? Can it be? I kept feeling like this was a '60s Disney film and at some point there were going to be mountain lions fighting bears, but alas, this is a surfing movie for all to consume. A throwback to when surfers were clean-cut and bore no tattoos. The cinematography is amazing, which is probably the biggest reason this film has stood up so well over the past 35 years. More importantly is the naƮve gaze of the surfers. Their klutzy brand of ethnography is sweet and harmless, even though now it seems a bit racist.