motherly lovin'

There's nothing so sweet and true as the love that forms between a mother and her son. And when that love turns to lovIN'... ahhhh yeah! Check that shit! Unfortunately, such an exquisite maternal connection is rare, but it does happen! The following films are living proof.

• Little Boy Blue (1997)--SONS: If Nastassja Kinski was YOUR mom, you'd definitely do her. MOMS: If hottie Ryan Phillippe was YOUR son, you wouldn't be able to keep your hands off him. DADS: If Nastassja Kinski was YOUR wife and Ryan Phillipe was YOUR son, you would have no choice but to stick them in the back of your station wagon and make them get it on so you could watch. VIEWERS: If this was the premise of a movie, you know you'd have to watch, too, no matter how dirty it made you feel. Well it is! And you can! Yee-hah!

• Spanking The Monkey (1994)--SONS: If Alberta Watson was YOUR mom, you'd do her in a second. MOMS: If Jeremy Davies was YOUR son... well, it'd be a little weird if you did him, but hell, we all have our quirks. VIEWERS: See this movie. A boy spends the summer trying to whack off in the bathroom without being interrupted, while his mother--with a broken leg and doped up on anti-depressants--demands his constant attention. It's a recipe for some steamy mother-son groovin'! Throw in a kick-ass Morphine soundtrack and you've got yourself a quality flick.

• Pink Flamingos (1972)--SONS: If Divine was YOUR mom... ah, forget it. Let's just say that there's a lot of wonderful material in this movie. The eating of the dog poo, the singing asshole, the woman in the crib, and of course perhaps the greatest moment of all: the giving of oral sex from Divine to her son, Crackers, in the living room of their arch enemies, the Marbles! John Waters has quite simply created one of the most poignant mother-son bonding sequences to ever hit the big screen. JUSTIN SANDERS