It's another sad day here at the Mercury as we bid farewell to our beloved food critic, Chris Onstad. Happily, he's not dead, and is simply leaving to pursue a new and exciting venture: starting an all-natural, craft soda company! (Oh my god, Chris is gonna NAIL that, and I'm gonna drink the crap out of it. Thanks for the pre-adult onset diabetes, Chris!) Good luck, Monsieur Onstad, you've been an inspiration to us all, and you have our sincere thanks for all your thorough, thought-provoking work!

Now I need a moment to allow my tears to dry, so here's the help wanted ad for our NEW FOOD CRITIC position. Even if you have a Totino Pizza Roll palate, take a look and please pass it on to anyone you think might be a good fit! THANK YOU!


The Portland Mercury is looking for a new food/restaurant/drink critic to add to our stable of great writers. COULD THAT BE YOU, OR SOMEONE YOU KNOW? Let's find out:

The successful candidate will have strong/snappy writing skills, a passion for food and drink, demonstrable knowledge of what makes a great dish and eatery, and a brain crammed full of information regarding the Portland restaurant scene. Reporting skills are a definite plus, as is prior food/drink criticism experience.

Duties include writing one restaurant review per week for the print edition, and publishing at least three blog posts per week on Blogtown, as well as being heavily involved with our bi-annual food/drink issues. This is a FREELANCE position, which allows the candidate plenty of time to have other employment, and this person can choose their own hours—as long as deadlines are met.

Pay is $125 per week, and meals eaten for review purposes are paid for (within reason of course) by the Mercury.

Interested parties should email editor Wm. Steven Humphrey HERE (put "FOOD AND DRINK CRITIC POSITION" in the subject line) and include the following:

• A cover letter describing why you're so awesome.

• A resume that includes pertinent experience.

• Up to six published food/drink writing clips (blog posts are acceptable, as are PDFs and URLs). No published clips? NO PROBLEM. Send in a 600-word review of a place you've eaten at recently.