The Mercury provides news and fun every single day—but your help is essential. If you believe Portland benefits from smart, local journalism and arts coverage, please consider making a small monthly contribution, because without you, there is no us. Thanks for your support!

GOOD AFTERNOON, PORTLAND! Okay, first let's check the weather, and... oooooh-WEE! It is HOT out there! You look like the perfect candidate for a $6 boozy, frozen cocktail courtesy of your fave local bars and the Mercury's SUMMER OF SLUSHIES. Slurp 'em up, and slurp a bit of this NEWS, too! (That was an ungraceful transition.)

IN LOCAL NEWS:

• Today in "Whoops... Never Mind!": A scant five days after announcing their hire for a brand-new "civilian training dean" position—who is a LAPD police sergeant—the Portland Police Bureau has retracted the job offer... and aren't really saying why? (But I bet ya five bucks the reason is SPICY!) Our Alex Zielinski has the latest.

• In more local cop drama, the city of Portland ONCE AGAIN has to pay out a buttload of money due to the excessive violence of Portland Police during the 2020 racial justice demonstrations. This time $55,000 is going to two independent Portland journalists who were victims of excessive force from the cops during the summer of 2020, just for trying to, you know... DO THEIR JOBS.

• Due to rising COVID-19 cases—spurred by the highly transmissible BA.5 subvariant—the Oregon Health Authority is urging everyone to start masking up again to avoid placing too much strain on hospitals who are having trouble keeping up with patient care.

• The city of Boise, Idaho, is doing their best to circumvent the short-sighted ambitions of power-hungry Republicans by passing a resolution saying that they will NOT be asking their local law enforcement to investigate abortion providers.

IN NATIONAL/WORLD NEWS:

• Following a surprising show of support from House Republicans, the heat is now on for GOP members of the Senate to either hop on the bus or torpedo a bill that would protect same-sex marriage in federal law.

• Meanwhile bipartisan legislation in the Senate that would close the loopholes in election law (that allowed Trump to do his dirty business and clarify the vice president's role in counting electoral votes) is gaining some welcome interest on the Hill.

• Uh-oh! After refusing to show up for a hearing, a judge has ORDERED bumbling traitor Rudy Giuliani to testify in Georgia's investigation of election interference in the state.

• Very much related: "Wisconsin House speaker says Trump called him to overturn 2020 results — 20 months after election."

• Again... related! After only calling two witnesses, federal prosecutors have rested their case against Trump toady Steve Bannon, after he clearly defied a subpoena from the January 6 committee. The defense will launch its (shaky) case tomorrow.

• Okay, you got me... I will watch:

• And finally... animals at the grocery store. THEY'RE JUST LIKE US!