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GOOD AFTERNOON, PORTLAND!  Expect lotsa rain and cool temps (with highs ranging from 56 to 60) until further notice... and yet? SO MANY Portlanders still wearing shorts! I salute those shorts... and welcome you to the NEWS.

IN LOCAL NEWS:

• According to a new poll from the Oregonian, 61 percent of Portlanders who have never apparently suffered from a "big problem" call graffiti a "big problem."

• Alert! 🚨 Here's your chance to comment on Mayor Wheeler's vague, unfunded plan to criminalize homelessness. 👇👇👇 

• REASON #3,456 NOT TO VOTE FOR RENE GONZALEZ: Besides being wildly inexperienced, cruel, an election law breaker, and propping up right-wing causes, if Rene Gonzalez is elected, we will have FOUR people on city council (out of five!) whose main priority is protecting the wealthy business interests of Portland. His too-quick, thoughtless support of Wheeler's unfunded, vague plan to criminalize homelessness flatly proves Gonzalez will happily say "Sir, yes, sir!" to any dangerous proposal that pops out of the mouths of the Portland Business Alliance and the utterly corrupt police union. (BTW, a city council stacked with puppets is another great reason to vote HELL YES to charter reform, and, of course, a DOUBLE HELL YES for Jo Ann Hardesty.) Have a great day! 😀

• Related: The Oregonian has published an internal review that sheds light on the paper's loooong history of racism, as well as its current editor's thoughts on how they're trying to do better. That's great... sincerely, good for them. But as long as they're doing all this self-examination, here's a suggestion: One way for media organizations to combat racism is to stop platforming, centering, and most of all ENDORSING the groups who are clearly profiting from and upholding systemic racism, and the people they support. But... you gotta start somewhere, right? So good job! (Two and a half out of four stars.)

• Hey, here's some great news! The Portland Thorns—who have put up with so much in the past few years—scored a last-minute, fantastic 2-1 win against the San Diego Wave, and so will head for the National Women’s Soccer League championship next weekend! WOO-HOOOO! (See? I don't always share terrible news!)

• Ready to get messy? Dig through this week's most delicious trash with THE TRASH REPORT from our Elinor Jones! Including: The Taylor Swift/Liz Truss connection, mysterious celeb salad dressings, and Steve Bannon fucks around—then finds out.  

IN NATIONAL/WORLD NEWS:

• Congrats (?!) to Rishi Sunak, who has become the third Prime Minister of England in seven weeks, and will join those lobsters in a pot of boiling water in an effort to steady the country's fumbling economy. Good luck, he will need it!

• Trump's Supreme Court strikes again:

• Yet another school shooting: This one left three dead, including the shooter, and injured numerous others at a high school in St. Louis. 

• After being dumped by his fashion house (Balenciaga) and his Hollywood representation (CAA), shoe giant Adidas is facing growing pressure to cut ties with Kanye West  for his antisemitic comments and general asshole behavior.

• RIP the oh-so-beloved Leslie Jordan (Designing Women) who repeatedly cheered me up during the pandemic with his hilariously sweet Instagram posts, and died today following a car crash in Hollywood. To say "he will be missed" is a devastating understatement.

• And finally... if you feel like falling in love today, here ya go.