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GOOD MORNING, PORTLAND! First of all... 🚨 ALERT! You only have until *this Sunday* to cram 48 (!!) of the most delicious, creative burgers into your mouth before the Mercury's BURGER WEEK comes to an end! (But we have faith in you.) Take a look at these gorgeous burgers! 😍 🍔 And while you're at it, take a look at this somewhat gorgeous NEWS.


• And the mayor's criminalization (and demonization) of the homeless continues: Mayor Ted Wheeler is expected to sign an emergency order today banning the houseless from camping along common walking routes to the area's schools. Considering there are 111 such learning institutions within the city, banning camping within an half-mile of each one will be a huge increase in the mayor's already existing ban that criminalizes camping on "dangerous roadways." And? Without giving this vulnerable population anywhere to go.

• Related: According to a new study, Portland ranks near the bottom of cities in post-pandemic recovery, claiming that according to cellphone data, our downtown area has only 42 percent of the activity it did in 2019. GEE, I WONDER WHY THAT IS.

• Oregon Republican Rep. James Hieb of Canby—who replaced candidate Christine Drazan when she began running for governor—was arrested on suspicion of disorderly conduct and interfering with a police officer at the Clackamas County Fair. He's claiming that it was just because he was smoking a cigarette and having a few beers... for what that's worth.

• As predicted, the state’s top public defender Steven Singer has been fired after a contentious reign and a very public beef with Oregon Supreme Court Chief Justice Martha Walters, who claims Singer was not doing enough to solve the state's very real public defender crisis. After dumping the commission who refused to fire Singer, the newly appointed (and remaining) members eventually voted in favor of giving the boot to the former leader—who called it "the most significant frontal attack on the independence of public defense ever in the United States.”

• Hey music lovers! Get cranked up for PDX Pop Now!, a headliner show from Sunbathe at Doug Fir, and a new Dungeons & Dragons in space compilation on the Kill Rock Stars label—it's all in Jenni Moore's weekly column, HEAR IN PORTLAND.


• With everything else going on it's easy to forget that Ukraine is still locked in a deadly war with Russia. Explosions have been reported in Crimea and a town bordering Russia, which Ukraine officials are confirming were part of their coordinated campaign. Meanwhile both countries are warning of an impending attack on the Zaporizhzhia nuclear power plant, which is currently under Russian control.

• We interrupt this segment to bring you some important, breaking news: DEMI LOVATO NEW ALBUM DROP!

• While the Justice Department has been reticent to release the affidavit attached to the Trump/Mar-a-Lago search warrant that's been requested by several media organizations, a judge is reportedly considering releasing a partial, redacted version that would protect witnesses who would surely receive multiple death threats from the Trump domestic terrorist militia. 

• Tech alert! Apple security experts are warning consumers of a flaw that could allow hackers to take total control over a person's iPhone, iPad, and/or Mac and are advising everyone to update their devices. From the AP: "[affected products include] the iPhone6S and later models; several models of the iPad, including the 5th generation and later, all iPad Pro models and the iPad Air 2; and Mac computers running MacOS Monterey. The flaw also affects some iPod models." Awwwww! Remember iPods?? (Sorry, I know this is serious.)

• A Florida judge has blocked Gov. Ron DeSantis' extremely racist "Stop WOKE Act" that would ban conversations about race in business and school settings because it is obviously and WILDLY unconstitutional and a clear violation of the First Amendment. (Just a reminder that using the word "woke" in the pejorative sense is an act of racist appropriation. Hi!)

• And finally... love this Friday energy.