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GOOD MORNING, PORTLAND!  If you loved this weekend's gorgeous weather, you're gonna get it for TWO more days, with sunny skies and highs in the mid-70s. And then? It all goes to shit again starting on Wednesday. 😭 Looks like it's back into the drawer for you, impossibly short shorts! 😭 And now for some impossibly short descriptions of today's NEWS.


• Hundreds of Portland Public School district students walked out of class and to the district's headquarters on Friday to protest the continuing war against Gaza and remember the more than 30,000 Palestinians who have been killed thus far. They also demanded that school officials create a curriculum to teach all grades about settler colonialism and Palestine, to openly denounce Israel's murderous war, and to cut ties with companies who are complicit in continuing the Israeli occupation of Palestinian territory.

• According to a new report, Portland's Office of Community and Civic Life did a crap job  managing the historic Kenton Firehouse—which for years has served as a community arts hub—and neglected to collect rent from tenants for the past two years, including state Rep. Travis Nelson (D—44) who apparently has not been paying rent for his offices in the building. Our Courtney Vaughn has more on this sticky wicket!

• If you're looking for a new building to house your roller skating rink/concert venue (that's my idea, but you can have it), you may want to take a peek at the old Sears building that's on the east end of the Lloyd Center Mall, which is currently for sale after the Texas company that owns that particular part of the building filed for bankruptcy. (And apparently there's no minimum bid! 🤑)

• Prick up those ears, food lovers! Sebastiano's has a new home in Sellwood, Rangoon Bistro's opened a second restaurant, Bar Norman bids adieu, and a new bar plans to take over the Sweet Hereafter space. It's the week in PORTLAND FOOD NEWS! 


• Today in "uh-oh," the Supreme Court will be taking up a case in which Republican states are challenging the federal government over how much control they can assert over lying, dangerous social media posts—such as the ones which threatened the lives of millions during the pandemic. The federal government countered that they have never hindered free speech or threatened the liars in any way—which is likely because Republican snowflakes think that anyone who calls them out on their bullshit is "attacking" them. (Somebody get those babies a sugar titty!)

• Surprise! Vladimir Putin has once again been reelected as the president of Russia after winning a "landslide" election in which any real competition was either scrubbed from the ballot, imprisoned, or killed. While many Russian citizens protested the scam election by showing up en masse to voting locations at noon on Sunday (as proposed by recently—and suspiciously—deceased activist Alexei Navalny as a demonstration of dissent), there was nothing to be done as the country is firmly in the grasp of autocratic rule. (Like a certain other country I could name, if things don't go well this coming November.)

• Trump's increasingly dire financial woes are finally catching up to him, as his lawyers claim he's unable to find any insurance company that will cover the $464 million bond he's been ordered to pay in his New York civil fraud case. And while he's unable to raise the cash to secure a bond during his appeal of the case, his lawyers say Trump's many properties are there for the taking if he's eventually unable to pay his fine. (OKAY JUST TAKE THEM NOW.)

• Terrible news for crafters like me: Longtime, beloved fabric and craft store JoAnn is filing for bankruptcy after years of being hobbled by online competition. The much better news is that the company does not plan to shutter any of its 829 stores nationwide—which means I won't be forced to shop at the damnable Michael's, or worse still, the creepy Christian-run Hobby (UGH!!!!) Lobby. (Yes, I know there are plenty of great local craft & sewing shops where I also spend my moderately hard-earned money, but no one will ever replace the soft spot I have in my heart for JoAnn's. 😢)

• I guess she's feeling better?

• For those who were bemoaning the loss of Sports Illustrated, rejoice... the print and digital version of the magazine will resume publication after being purchased by Minute Media, which also runs The Players’ Tribune and FanSided. No word yet on whether the 80 unionized staffers who were laid off two months ago will regain their jobs.

• And finally... if there's a hornier way to play basketball, I'm standing by to see it!