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GOOD MORNING, PORTLAND!

Now don't panic... but the Mercury's delicious NACHO WEEK ends this Sunday! So hurry up and gobble down 36 varieties of creative takes on nachos from your fave Portland restaurants as quickly as possible... and, don't forget, they're only $8 each! Now let's gobble down some NEWS! (Does that sounds dirty? Maybe a little dirty.)

IN LOCAL NEWS:

β€’ Forgive me for saying so... but is Commissioner (and mayoral wannabe) Rene Gonzalez starting to get kind of WEIRD about his infatuation for the police? Check out this eye-popping report from our Courtney Vaughn about Gonzalez announcing that the city should reign in negative comments about the cops during public meetings, adding that by allowing them to do so the council is "platforming nonsense." Apparently he doesn't like it when members of the public rightly point out that local cops can be occasionally VERY violent and are costing Portland hundreds of thousands of dollars in lawsuits. Or maybe he doesn't like the First Amendment... unless you happen to be smooching up to the cops or demonizing the homeless? I dunno. Anyway, read the story, it's great.

β€’ In related news, let's see if Rene Gonzalez would also approve of this behavior: After years of doing nothing, Oregon State Police have finally agreed to investigate a disturbing incident in which supervisors and members of its crowd control team held a mock trial in which they hazed a new member by hurling homophobic slurs and planting gay pornography on him as "evidence." To the surprise of no one, according to accusations from insiders, this sort of bigoted behavior has been repeated over the years. (But yeah... don't say anything bad about them! It might hurt their feelings!)

β€’ ICYMI:

β€’ Probably due to his upcoming retirement, Oregon US Rep. Earl Blumenauer is one of a growing number of Democrats calling on President Biden to step aside and abandon his bid for reelection. He's the first Oregon congressperson to do so, though U.S. Sen. Jeff Merkley has said that the concerns of Dems β€œmerit serious consideration.”

β€’ An eastern Oregon woman is appealing the state's (VERY CORRECT) decision to reject her bid to become a foster mom because of her anti-LGBTQ+ views, as well as her refusal to support the queer children in her care. The woman is now trying to sue the state and get these foster care rules changed. (That's "loving Christianity" in action.)

IN NATIONAL/WORLD NEWS:

β€’ Today marks yet another big "make-or-break" test for the embattled President Biden as he will be fielding questions from reporters during a big news conference today (3:30 pm Pacific). Meanwhile more Dems are hopping on to the train asking him to step aside for someone who's more electable than convicted felon Donald Trump. (Can you believe we live in a world where I just said that??) Actor and longtime supporter George Clooney has also joined the Biden dog-pile, agreeing with many that the prez should end his bid for reelection. (Again, can't believe I wrote that.)

β€’ Speaking of convicted felon and serial liar Donald Trump, he's saying that he has "no idea" who's behind the dystopian Republican "Project 2025" plan. Well, that's pretty weird, because as it turns out "at least 140 people who worked in the Trump administration had a hand in Project 2025" according to a review by CNN.Β 

β€’ Not that it will help Biden, but the oppressive inflation rate took another sharp dive in June,Β  which means that the Federal Reserve could lower interest rates on mortgages, credit cards, and more.

β€’ In an example of a Democrat actually doing something rather than just flapping their gums, Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez has launched articles of impeachment against the absolutely terrible Supreme Court Justices Samuel Alito and Clarence Thomas for their constant and flagrant acceptance of gifts from their rich GOP benefactors. (While the articles may not pass the GOP controlled House, just think what might happen if the Dems recapture it in the not too distant future? Hint, hint, VOTE.)Β 

β€’ Today in "YIKES ALMIGHTY": "Some southern supermarkets now sell ammo out of vending machines."

β€’ And finally... you are all very good [insert your gender preference here].