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Good morning, Portland! We're in for temperatures in the mid-60s with a good chance of rain throughout the day. Thank you to all of you who removed your bike fenders when it was sunny—seriously, we need the rain, so keep it coming.
Also, it's HIGHBALL WEEK, meaning you can get a really yummy $10 cocktail from a variety of establishments around Portland. Some suggestions: For something fruity and sweet, check out the Cabana Boy at Hey Love. The Nutty Professor at Swine Moonshine & Whiskey Bar is perfect for people with refined palates or those who can pretend to enjoy whiskey and bitters for the sake of their dark academia aesthetic. Then there's the Ojisan Frank at Toya Ramen & Bar, which looks like an amazing, delicious innovation— what the Mercury's food and drink weeks are all about! Finally, the white Negroni highball at The Pour House looks good, and probably gets you pretty toasted.
Drink responsibly, my friends. Now, here's the news.
IN LOCAL NEWS:
• Fans of the Portland Trail Blazers (which is, like, everyone in this city, except for the people who currently hate the team but would definitely be fans if they started winning again) got some big news this morning. The Paul G. Allen Estate, which currently owns the team, announced it will sell the Blazers (along with the rest of its sports holdings, eventually). While some Blazers fans are excited by the news, hoping it will mean a new direction for Portland's beloved basketball team, others are concerned it could (I said COULD) mean the team will leave our city. A couple years ago, Phil Knight expressed an interest in buying the Blazers and was rejected, and it's unclear if the Nike magnate still wants the team. Despite the fact that Knight already has a borderline monopoly over many of Oregon's largest assets, many now hope he bids for the Blazers again to guarantee the team will stay in Portland. Because if the Trail Blazers leave, I genuinely fear for us all. (And I'm a PORTLAND BOOSTER! I never say stuff like that!)
While I'm fearfully praying to Daddy Knight (you can take the girl out of the U of O but you can't take the U of O out of the girl), the Mercury's Nolan Parker sees an opportunity to collaborate on an amazing opportunity to create a co-op basketball team. This would be cool for anti-capitalist reasons and would provide a chance to get to know the "towering cuties" of the Portland Trail Blazers. Are the members of the Portland Trail Blazers our collective boyfriends? That's certainly an interesting way to look at the relationship between the highly profitable sports industry and the modern American city. And, I mean, Matisse Thybulle is undeniably gorg. I suppose we'll all have to wait and see what happens next.
• If you think the Pacific Northwest is a haven for climate action in an otherwise fossil fuel-dependent country, you're wrong! A new investigation from OPB and ProPublica details just how behind Oregon and Washington are in making the switch to clean energy, and the situation is only expected to get worse as electrical demand increases over the next 20 years, largely because data centers are using up so much power.
• The Malheur Enterprise, the paper that covered Eastern Oregon's Malheur County for 116 years, is closing permanently at the end of May, leaving the county with scant news resources. The closure is especially tough because it comes after a flourishing period for the newspaper, after it was purchased by new owners. When they decided to sell, though, they didn't find a new buyer to step up to the plate. Now, residents of the Eastern Oregon county will have only one newspaper to turn to, the Argus Observer, which is facing financial challenges of its own.
• Have you, like me, been looking forward to the new Tim Robinson/Paul Rudd film? Either way, check out Dom Sinacola's review in the Mercury, which calls the movie a piece of the canon in our current "golden age of pathetic men." If anyone can turn the "crisis of masculinity" into something utterly absurd (more than it already is), it's Tim Robinson.
• As always, the Mercury has curated some excellent music picks for you—so make your plans for the week accordingly.
There continues to be heaps of live music happening in Portland, and Mercury Music Picks continues to be a guiding light—sharing with you the best of the best 😇
— Portland Mercury (@portlandmercury.com) May 13, 2025 at 2:21 PM
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IN NATIONAL/WORLD NEWS:
• Republicans in Congress are working to pass a “BIG, BEAUTIFUL BILL” (in the words of our president), and we should all be scared. The bill, which is certainly big but far from beautiful, looks to implement major tax cuts in part by rolling back crucial climate programs from Biden’s Inflation Reduction Act— which will make energy more expensive, by the way. It would also make Medicaid harder to access, likely meaning the loss of health insurance for millions of Americans. It’s a complete nightmare of a bill that would be completely devastating if passed—truly, mark my words.
• The Food and Drug Administration, under the terrible leadership of a certain Kennedy, is moving to ban fluoride supplements, citing bunk claims that ingesting fluoride is bad for the gut microbiome. This appears to be a stop along the way to a ban on fluoride in the country's water supply, which these Make America Healthy Again freaks want to do because they presumably all have a financial stake in the veneers industry. That's a joke, but if Kennedy gets his way re: fluoride, people's teeth are going to be majorly screwed up. In Portland, where people were "crunchy" before it was cool, our water system is fluoride-free—and kids have more dental issues as a result. Fluoride supplements are one of the few tools dentists can use to counteract that, and now the FDA may take them away. There are more root canals in your kids' futures!!!! YAY!
• At a time when immigrants and low-income people are being targeted at all levels by the far-right federal government, Democratic Governor Gavin Newsom wants to make things even worse by pausing state-funded health care for low-income immigrants in California. The policy was just implemented last year, but Newsom—who has lately been in the news for his ridiculous podcast, which has featured the likes of Steve Bannon and Charlie Kirk—now wants to get rid of the program as a way to reconcile a statewide budget deficit. I look forward to 2027, when Newsom will be forced out by term limits. His capitulation and lack of quality leadership will also serve him poorly in a potential 2028 presidential run.
• Oklahoma law now requires public school teachers to teach kids about “discrepancies” in the 2020 election results, AKA continue to spread the lie that Trump won reelection that year and had the presidency stolen by Joe Biden. We are cooked!
• Finally, I'll harken back to today's basketball team with this video of a cat running onto the court during a basketball game in Greece. I appreciate how the commentator handled this moment. Happy Wednesday!