Lead! Radon! Gorillas! Oh my! It's about time we lock all of our precious little ones in sterile boxes with 24 hour video monitoring. We can pipe in filtered air, water, and organic food (peanut and gluten free), using a non toxic piping system of course. How else could they ever grow up to be productive members of society like the adults who were also exposed to these hazards?! Children are our future, and we must protect them at all costs!