I haven't dated in over a year, but it's not something I think about on a regular basis. I spend most nights watching old home movies (super 8 & 8mm) I find at estate sales or thrift stores and listening to albums. It passes the time and is rather entertaining. Something this morning made me realize that I might have been single for too long.

I have this natural "Herbal Pine" deodorant that sucks as a deodorant but works wonders on a different part of the body: The Buttocks. And no, it doesn't smell like a car air freshener; that would be gross.

Yes, back when I was dating and getting ready to leave for the night, a spritz or two in between the ol' cheeks and you were good to go. Sometimes, when I brought someone over and things were getting hot and heavy, I'd sneak into the bathroom to not only brush my teeth, but also refresh my ass. You never know when you got some stink going on down there, and assuring that there's no ripeness is simply the courteous thing to do

Well, this morning I opened a bathroom drawer and saw the pine deodorant bottle buried under a tissue box. I thought back to the last time I used it... the last time I NEEDED to use it... and I couldn't remember. It just made me realize that I haven't had the need to refresh my buttocks because nobody's gone south of the equator for some time now.

Perhaps it's time to put that bottle to use once again...