Hey Saint Dickhead!

Comments

1
Gridlock will make you crazy, but you should learn to breathe and relax. Drivers should not block intersections OR driveways, so letting that one car out of the driveway of the parking lot is just the right thing to do. It did no damage to you and it kept traffic flowing. Because of this, you did not get the opportunity to bust through a stale yellow light (or even a fresh red light, as I bet you are quite willing to do). You were gifted a fresh green light on the next cycle.If you leave earlier, you won't be late and won't be suffering from the false urgency you have created in your mind. You can do it!
2
Fortunato is right. The only dickhead is you, I/A.
3
Traffic in Portland sucks. We drive cautiously and courteously to keep each other safe. If this social code isn't your jam, perhaps you should look at new cities...
4
I'm with IA. Was driving down Burnside near Old Town before the bridge and this utter flaming piece of shit jackass refused to scooch. Motherfucker had enough space without obstructing the intersection, but fucker sat there and allowed every asshole wanting to take a right on their red turn so we'd miss every motherfucking light for miles. By the time I got around him I was nearly homicidal. Should I relax? Fuck yeah, but then my IA submission would be a shitty existential traffic poem about unnecessarily wasting time on the fucking road behind some shitty driving douchebag piece of shit garbage motherfucker!! Aaaahhhhh!!
6
I didn't post the above IA. I do agree with it though.
8
It wasn't. "IA submission"=Not-So-A-Comment. I must've been thinking about my own past IA traffic rants. As a matter of fact.... I was stuck behind some gap driving asshole last night going 45 mi/hr on I-84 with a 1/4 mile between him and the car in front of him. I couldn't go around bc next lane was moving slower yet people getting on the freeway managed to breeze past him adding to the distance between me and my fucking exit. I was in my own living hell and just when it couldn't get better the good for nothing piece of dog shit flipped me off. Why? Evidently I was supposed to give him a 1/4 mile of space from behind to create the bubble he so rightfully deserves. Mind you, no one else is driving like him. He's driving like a douche unlike everyone else who can manage to move faster, yet he flips me off. This is why we can't have a civilized society. Assholes who hold up traffic bc they can.