I left a few new squeaky toys for dog. I'm sure she'll find them before you do.
Also got some extra bowls. You needed them.
There's an alarm clock in your shed set to go off in the wee hours.
I got some play dough and super glue and closed off some of your dab pieces. Not the ones you use regularly.
Left some peanut butter in your vents.
Walked nextdoor with that nice little shiner you gave me and handed our landlord a note that said simply, "there were some issues and I won't be needing the room anymore. Check the garage door."
Yeah. The one he just fixed. The one you drove into last week when you were drunk. Sober me is responsible for things Not-Sober me does. Thing to consider.
Maybe I am doing this all wrong. I see you as a person who does others harm. Maybe one day, I'll get better at your game. For now, I will keep playing mine.