For those of you old enough to remember, I’m sure you will agree there are several things that don’t add up about “Gilligan’s Island.”
First, it wasn’t an island charter with ‘free lunches,” and they didn’t get lost when “the weather started getting rough.”
They were smugglers.
Consider the course: A three hour trip round trip means 90 minutes out, 90 minutes back- a small boat making maybe 12 knots could only travel 15 miles or so out from port, therefore it couldn’t stray or get blown that far off course. There wouldn’t be an “uncharted desert isle” within that radius.
Next, consider the on-board manifest:
The Skipper and Gilligan were the muscle.
Gilligan, young, strong, stupid. Absolutely doing what he was told.
The Skipper, a war vet accustomed to violence, a leader of men, a loner and master of his boat.
The Professor and Mrs. Howell were the rubes-cover in case they got boarded and searched. Or maybe hostages if things got tight.
Mr. Howell was actually Mr. Big, the man with the money and the product. He chartered the trip to make a delivery (A billionaire like himself would have his own yacht. No way he’d be on the dinky Minnow. And no way he’d put his own boat at risk of seizure if they were caught. )
Ginger and Mary Anne were company: playthings for Mr. Howell. No billionaire, then or now, would be with Lovey. He’d have trophy women.
Ginger, a Marilyn wannabe-a gangster’s mol.
Mary Ann-she wasn’t there because she won some baking contest. Great legs, great abs: nobody from Kansas is that hot. She was backup for Ginger, or when Thurston wanted a three- way.
As for where they went and offoaded, well, that’s the true location of Gilligan’s Island.