Why on earth do they not cut the bagels in half longitudinally? Who said, I decree the that the bagel shops in Portland shall not make the sandwiches easy to eat. They shall be challenging AND very rarely have the correct amount of cream cheese. Further, if you order an egg on a bagel, it will be microwaved. Who made that ridiculous decision? Have you ever once thought to yourself, I really want an egg, but in order to make it less pleasurable, I'm going to microwave it into a bouncy, sturdy, sulfury hockey puck and then put it on a bagel that's not cut in half longitudinally. Don't even get me started on the bagel shops that serve toasted bagels to stay with the cream cheese on the side...