First, there were Segways. I still can't believe people ride these things. I further can't believe there are tour groups. And what's the reason for wanting to actually spend money to ride these things to see the city? People do stupid things to be entertained.

Second, welcome to Biketown. Again, why would anyone spend money to ride these things. It must be nice to have money to waste. There are folks that own bikes, multiple bikes, yet will ride these orange beauties. Even more moronic, no helmet required.

Third, Escooters. These require helmets. Wanna know what? Of all the people I've seen riding them and there are many already, no helmets. Fuck the law. Fuck safety. Tri-met has released their Escooters too. The idea is to assist in connecting with transit. Well what idea is ever regulated, especially amongst this anything goes Portland culture? Then, riding on the sidewalk? Seriously? Next time, someone is riding on the sidewalk when I'm walking, I won't move. I will knock them down.

No need to think about the first person to die because seems like Portland society is behind these forms of transportation, and cars yield everything to these guys because cars are such patient and respecting modes of transit.
What's will the next joke be to this city?