City of Portland:

I want to thank you for your help today with my attempts to comply with the City’s new anti-AirBNB regulations. As a landlord and owner Of two properties in the City of Portland for many years, I just want To comply with the law. And stuff.

First off, I’m hoping you can share the following information with The folks who are being tasked to implement these new rules.

Let me just start this letter by saying that I have never, ever had Any intention of renting my property with AirBNB or any other Temporary housing company. None, That means; I want to rent out my basement to someone who Will sign a 1-year lease.

Your new law, in my view, penalizes me in a major way in terms of Time and effort, when all I’m trying to do is comply.

Think about that— I am just trying to do as you ask. In return, you have Enacted an ill-conceived policy to make my life hell.

Backstory here: My basement flooded 18 months ago. Act of Nature.

All I am trying to do is pull a permit from the City of Portland to Fix My Basement. Your new law makes that nearly impossible, from what I can tell.

I spent three hours on Friday on both sides of the river dealing with County and City people who have no idea how to help me comply With your new law.

“COULD YOU MAKE THIS PROCESS ANY MORE ONEROUS OR PAINFUL FOR ME AS A LANDLORD?”

I don’t think so.

PS: now that I’m done writing this calmly, do want this fucking email Notarized or something?????