I was on a date at an I, Anonymous show. She and I were sharing our appreciation for the hilarity in hushed whispers when you leaned in and told us to "Shut the fuck up." My heart beat fast, 'cause that was fucking rude and you seemed roided to the gills. I gave you some snark back a few minutes later, and we "stepped outside" (near the bathroom). I talked calmly, 'cause you seemed on the verge of a Berserker attack, and I'm not much of a fighter. You didn't take kindly to my level-headed reasoning nor to my hand on your shoulder. "Don't touch me, Dilbert!" I have to admit, that was funny. Eventually, you left and I was able to bring my heart rate back down to normal just in time to kiss my date for a bit then never see her again. I wonder what your deal was. I assume you don't wanna talk about it.
I'm gonna remember that Dilbert line...