Yes, I enjoy pineapple on my pizza. Sometimes I even invite others to dine on this unholy pie as well.
I understand you may find this lifestyle choice ours offensive to your morally hip sensibilities, but that’s really not our problem. That’s very much your problem, so call a therapist and get to work on that already.
And please don’t try to make it my problem by trying to get the pie topping banned by city council. Or use it as an ironic excuse to fight people in the streets in the name of the freedom to undemocratically impose your topping choices on others.
( Of course Ted Wheeler should resign, but we already paid him and he owes us some work hours first. We can play our card on that one later in the year. )
Just chill the freak out and mind your own pizza business.
Yeah, I probably wrote this just to piss you off and provoke a reaction but you know what, that’s your problem now.
Go call your therapist or at least your mother.