Who the fuck do you think you are to try to tell me how to interact with my fucking city!?!

You're gooddamn right, I'm a bitch.

We bitch about Portland because we fucking care. I'm a lover.

We love this city and we're going to continue fighting for it till the end of the line.

Are you familiar with how democracies operate? I'm a child.

Basically, it works by complaining about shit, identifying who else doesn't like the same shit, then working together to fix shit on behalf of others.

We will not be silenced. I'm a mother.

We can really tell how much you "don't give a fuck's fuckity-fuck" by your rant.

Obviously you're not much of a reader so lets give you a quick breakdown. I'm a sinner.

Silent cops are complicit cops, and the Portland Police is one of the most corrupt and ineffective departments in the nation. I'm a saint.

Ted Wheeler is an incompetent, who willfully presided over the democratic decline of Portland.

Traffic is traffic. And I do not feel ashamed.

The Homelessness is on Ted, at one point he staked he career on finding a bed for every homeless Portland, now he prefers to level veiled threats against first amendment demonstrators. I'm your hell.

I've actually never heard a Portlander complain about garbage, sure I see it hear and there, but we are a lot cleaner than other cities of comparable size. I'm your dream.

If you don't like our bitching, join us. We are damn proud of our city and we would welcome whatever weird contributions you'd bring to the city with you. I'm nothing in between.

Stop buying into the hype, and go outside to actually experience Portland.

You know you wouldn't want it any other way.