"I got some juicy juicy gossip about JoAnn Hardesty. Wanna hear it?"

"Um, what if it's not true?"

"Don't be a Grinch... In my head it's true."

Thus, emergency response in Portland. Blend with shitty, pouty cops, and you might have a real problem. But the police union will end up blaming you for not being nicer to pauvre pauvre popo.