Portland Patio Pages

I, Anonymous Blog

The views expressed in these submissions are from anonymous, unverified sources and do not necessarily represent those of the Portland Mercury.

Some of the Rioters

are being charged with Unlawful Entry, a ticket payable by mail. The guy wearing skins and horns and carrying a metal spear was only charged with violent entry and disorderly conduct.
They'll all be empowered and back at it on January 20. Thanks, Amerikka.

Sage Advice

Change is scary but braving it is better than storming the Capital.

Make No Mistake

What we're seeing now started with George W. Bush, scion of the elite fascists of this nation, Skull and Bones, an ignorant religionist, unqualified, impunity personified. He and Cheney and Rove created meaningless wars and sent the white, black and brown sons and daughters of the exploited to fight it; they harnessed the fury of the white underclass and used it to crush independent thought in the Republican Party; they sicced the thugs on the Iraqis and Afghanis, on immigrants, on unionists, on activists of any stripe but Tea Party. The Martini Democrats, the Libertarian poseurs, the Republican grifters, the overclass, the petty managers and entrepreneurs, didn't really mind that much as long as the stock market and their inflated salaries continued to rise while the working class sank and sank. Then Trump picked up on the white fury after Obama and stoked it for four years while McConnell kissed his ass and the Democrats dithered. Can the FBI, now, alone root out the insurrectionists among our fellow citizens, the police, the military? Do we have the will to stop dreaming and make a stand against racist, fascist elements in America? If Pelosi, Schumer, Pence and McConnell had been killed quickly, would the Congress be meeting right now, at all? Or would the monsters be laughing in the Capitol while Trump prepared to inaugurate himself to a second term? Do you think about it or do you go back to sleep and hope for your next package from Amazon to arrive, your next tweet or instagram or tiktok to get some Likes?

All Yours

Stolen, You can have it.
Remember that time i was casually talking to you, you're mostly my coworker, a tiny bit friend, about themes for kids rooms where I said I texted our boss about what I saw at an interior design show. I said "I'm going to infiltrate your phone with images," to our boss which I told you. Then I told you about some of the various themes which gave you ideas. Then I saw the video on the YouTube channel we have that our boss is now appearing in about different kid themed rooms.
Only one place that idea came from.
You can sell that idea as yours, I don't care.

Help. Just help.

So 911 CAN OUT YOU ON HOLD. It's already known 911 is for emergencies only. They will also transfer you to the non emergency line without listening to you. The non emergency line CAN TAKE AS MANY OR MORE THAN 10 MIN to reach SONEONE.

There's beginning talks of a 3rd stimulus. Back up, I haven't gotten my 2nd one. My second one is "status unavailable." So that means needing to wait to claim it as recovery rebate when filing taxes. That could be mid Feb when all W2s are received or as late as April when I typically file because I hate doing these fucking taxes that arbitrarily come up with new rules each year. I also can't help but think it plays into taxes for next year. I also can't help but think my gross income this year will determine how much of the 600 I get back although DEAD PEOPLE GOT THEIRS. Or if I do owe which I have in recent years because taxes suddenly changed in this new administration, that will also deduct from the 600.

If you need help, count on no one should be the automated message.

I'm Wondering, Too

Did any cops get killed by BLM protesters?

Just Wondering

Law enforcement in DC were armed to the teeth and lined up for BLM peaceful march and demonstration. The people there never intended to be violent, so a totally disproportionate preparation. However, skim-milk white "patriots" (repugnant title) show up having provided extensive forewarning of violence, salivating for skirmishes, and there is seemingly *no* preparation. JUST WONDERING if they had been lined up, armed and armored, if there would have been even more violence and destruction? Don't misunderstand, I don't think it was some genius planning on the part of the capitol police.

Trumpism, QAnon should merge and form a religion

In religion, you can believe anything you want. In reality, you need some verifiable facts to support your positions.

The problem with Trumpism and QAnon is the difficulty they have running into reality. Rigged elections? Prove it! Democratic child molesters? Facts, please. But if these two forces merged, they could anoint Trump as their God, build churches, and meet on Sundays. Instead of planning armed insurrections, they could do like all other religions, and pray for salvation. Plus Trump could collect all the tithes and not have to pay taxes.

The Capitol Riot - So Educational

Now maybe those who never read anything if it isn't on TwitFace or Instafool can see with their eyes, in action, the America that truly exists, in contrast to the delusional fantasy many hold. There is a white male supremacy party in the nation and its members are always around you, in plain site. The guys you pay for services (if you're not too picky—I wouldn't hire them), the guys in uniforms, the guys who work at rip-off jobs, the guys whose girlfriends and children come dead last behind guns, trucks, dogs and beer. They might work out and some are not ugly, so they get out among us and charm some and take the money of most. It's a big mistake to laugh at them, call them chuds, dismiss them. They're not joking about taking the country back. No way do they want to live in a nation where men of color are their equals before law and society, where women white or of color are their equals, where how or who one loves doesn't matter, where they have to compete just like everybody else on merit, not privilege. Trump is just their excuse to tell the rest of us—you will not get to have an America where you can exist in security. WE get to make the rules and that is what God, capitalism and America means: white straight mean men rule.

You're in the wrong line of work

My friend's antivaxxer coworker got the 'rona, after having the distinct and rare option of being among the precious first few to be offered the chance to sign up for the vaccine.
and declining it.
Who could have foreseen such a shocking event.
I am just going to say.
Point fuckin blank.
If you are against vaccination, you have no right to be working in health care in any capacity.
There are people with legitimate medical reasons they can't get vaccinated, and it's up to the rest of us to get a quick stick because they can't.
And how dare any of you enable these conspiracy fuckers and spread more disinformation about their "dangers."
You went to school for this, you should know better.
You have blood on your hands, and no amount of sanitizer is gonna get that damn spot out.

I swear to uphold and defend the Constitution

The "Patriots" are out in force. It's real simple, everyone seen in the Capital Building should be identified and charged with insurrection, I'll settle for criminal trespassing.

Should those supporting the President's Coup attempt remain uncharged, our democracy will fall. The need to defend the Constitution is very clear, and the law.


Yes love wins. But does anyone really have it?
Love is like money. It ruins everything.
It could be argued love can turn to hate.
Or love is lust and a crush for something we will never have.
Love does make fools of everyone.
So, really, all this "I love you" on social media to people you barely or do not know. Great message but gimme a break.
Is that really love you feel?
Is it really love I see during my day?
Is all the litter, love?
Is everyone I see on their phone keeping to themselves, and wary of one another when I ask a simple question like 'got the time, or do you know where this street is,' love?
Is it love to be maskless?
Is it love to steal, destroy property, fight, or shoot someone?
Is your road rage, love?
Is your impatience, love, when you're speeding down the highway?
Is that love walking past the house less on our busy days?
Is that love to hear you complain about who you hate and what you don't like?
Come on, let's be real.

Crunch Wrap Supreme

To the two NPR babbling, crunchy women ahead of me in the walk up to the Human Bean in Hollywood on NYE, you’re major assholes. The young people working there are in their freshman courses at uni. I had to listen to your stupid long winded requests for a specialty “vegan” coffee with a list of pretentious instructions, and noticed one of you were carrying Rigoberta Menchú’s controversial (and questionable as to being truthful) “ I, Rigoberta Menchú” a feminist woman from Guatemala writing about the genocide of her indigenous people. Reeking of body odor, cracked pepper, and essential oils, you both were discussing female empowerment (and sadly not personal hygiene, because a six foot distance wasn’t enough outdoors to escape the funk between the two of you)...a conversation you were having as your change of 45 cents, was the tip you left for your baristas. Did you not see the young girls right in front of you working during this pandemic to give you your coffee? As a regular there and a worker in the service industry, I took care of your tip as you should have and slipped them a 10 spot to cover the three of us. You’re both utter, complete assholes and I hope you choked on your tempeh casserole that night.

No mask, no service

You nasty fucking redneck bitch. When I told you your mask had to be on in my store you told me I could EAT YOUR ASS so loud that several other of my customers — and their children — could hear it. I know you don’t believe that masks work because that’s what you’ve been told to believe, and I don’t fault you for your lack of intelligence or education that could otherwise allow you to examine the scientific proof and decide for yourself. Look, I don’t care if you go home and open mouth kiss every second causin you can find before you let them eat your nasty ass, but in my store, I *am* the “mask police” and I will protect my staff and other customers from your ignorance. My dad died of COVID six months ago and I can’t afford to lose anyone else.
p.s. Nobody is going to eat your ass. You probably believe that wiping after you take a Burger King shit doesn’t work, either.

The Mayer

"Some people just want to watch the world burn." - Theodore "Ted" Tevis Wheeler

Our mayor is the dang Joker, folks. That should concern all of us.