Or so the song goes. When I found out I was sterile I breathed a sigh of relief. All of my friends have babies or are pregnant, and its a fucking literal shitty nightmare. Yay you had a baby, you understand the universe and mystery of life and blah blah blah doulas! I guess my real complaint is how boring you all are now, and how I never realized you were gross suburban yuppies. Do I have to hang out with 21 year olds now to have actual fun that doesn't involve talk of organic fair trade "nappies?" (shit clothes) OK now I'm going to actually stay up late enough to watch Game of Thrones! Don't worry, I know you can't make it that late before you pass out into your enormous pile of medical debt. Yeah, I'm bitter. Whatever. Rather bitter than boring.