WHENEVER I’m taking a stroll down a sidewalk, there will inevitably be someone with a dog on a leash. A sidewalk is designed to let two HUMANS walk past each other with an adequate amount of room. Add a mutt on a leash taking up the space for a human walking in the opposite direction, and there’s nowhere else to go. So here’s my request: MOVE YOUR FUCKING DOG. Seriously, you obviously see me coming from a half a block away, and yet you continue to let your mutt take up the space reserved for PEOPLE going in the opposite direction. I’ve actually called people out on this, saying, “Can you move your dog over?” All I’ve ever gotten are blank stares or condescending grunts. Your dog isn’t a human, so tug on that fucking leash to move it over a bit so I don’t have to be subservient to a butt-licking, crap-eating, flea-infested animal. Take that Pine State Biscuit, Little Big Burger, or Salt ’n’ Straw cone out of your mouth and control your fucking animal, will you? Fucking thanks!—Anonymous
MOVE YOUR FUCKING DOG.
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