Dear City of Portland,
Where the fuck are all the trash cans?! With the incline of tourists and an assload of food carts, you'd think there would be a plethora of receptacles for their greasy, gentrified wasted food to find shelter in. Instead, we get In-your-face rotting Oblisks of discarded waste overflowing the smallest of cans that have eventually been located. We want a clean city and you have replaced the eco-friendly, easily-located bins with Nike bike stations. Get your shit together! Oh wait, you're more interested in insanely-expensive apartment complexes for fuckheads who saw Portlandia once. Pull your fat heads out of each other's assholes and see there's plenty to do around here.