I kept telling him to stop, but no one ever does. He kept grabbing my wrist and poking at me.
I have so little control in life. Not even over my own body.
One night when he tried to pull me off my bunk while reading, I jumped down and hit him with a sharp kick in the groin. It was supposed to be a warn shot. Let him know I was serious. I saw the next few strikes, but I didn't want to finish it. I tried to de-escalate too late.
He choked me out. I lost. Don't stand up for yourself. Don't set boundaries. If you're going to hit someone, plan on putting them on the ground.
Why are we all such self absorbed pieces of shit? If everyone around you is an asshole, maybe it's you. I guess I have some stuff to work on.
I think about going back to a jail or prison as a solution to my problems. Housing for one. Food. A small amount of "safety". It's not much different out here. Everyone's a dick everywhere. I asked for help from a lot of people. They all just told me to shut up.
I'm sure some of my problems are indeed psychological, but they are superceded by my financial problems. No one cares if you crazy and depressed if you're also broke. No value is no value. Go kill yourself