Hey there entitled dog owning bro...

I’m not sure what you were getting at when I waved and yelled: “hey, your dog!” as it bounded toward me and my pizza, and you yelled back: “yelling won’t help!” followed by expletives.

You know, like most of Portland, that particular park requires a leash. Something about the pandemic has you and your dog-loving brethren thinking the world is your fire hydrant, but there are dozens of us who have allergies, actual or emotional, to your best friend. And that dog you choose to have behaves as you allow it—it is a reflection of *your* manners. So given that it ran over and licked half of my pizza without a care for anyone but itself, I suppose it only follows suit that you blamed me and didn’t have the decency to offer cash to replace the food I could no longer eat.

Perhaps my favorite part was when you left with a woman yelling indiscernible sounds from across the field.

Take the $20 you owe me for my pizza and buy a leash. Your dog shares your lack of boundaries and poor social skills.