I am 81 years old and thinking of running away from home. You see I live in a maladapted and abusive family. And I just can’t take it anymore. My home is the United States of America. My family consists of the people of that country. We have a lot of father figures in my home. Actually, the only figures that seem to matter to my many siblings are the father figures. There are the political leaders, the clergymen, the chief executives of corporations, and media personalities. They are all my adoptive dads. They mistreat me constantly, taking away my hard-earned privileges and telling me lies every time they open their mouths. And they always keep the best food for themselves. My moms are mostly quiet, cooking and cleaning and giving me a steady stream of new brothers and sisters. They are sometimes quite loving, but easily cowed. My moms and dads argue all the time, and sometimes the arguments get physical. Dads don’t like it when moms get assertive. To make matters worse, my brothers and sisters hate one another. And they have guns. Does anyone know the phone number for Children’s Protective Services?