Hello.... Thank you for calling the Social Security Administration. If your check is missing, please hold. Due to President Trump’s workforce cuts, your call will be answered in approximately 38 hours. Thank you for calling the US Veterans Department. We appreciate your service. Due to President Trump’s workforce cuts, the next available doctor’s appointment is in 143 days. Thank you for calling FEMA. This department has been disbanded by President Trump. If your house has been destroyed by a hurricane, or tornado, or wildfire, please contact your insurance company. Thank you for calling Farmers, or State Farm, or Allstate. Your claim is denied. There is no appeal, as the regulatory board has been disbanded by executive order. Thank you for contacting Congressman Cliff Bentz. I can no longer accept your calls because my feelings were hurt at the last town hall by constituents angry at my support of President Trump. Have a nice day, and MAGA. Thank you for applying for SNAP benefits. This program has been eliminated by executive order. If your child is hungry, tell them to find a job. Thank you for contributing to President Trump’s reelection. We hope you are pleased as we are doing exactly as promised. Please Hold until 1/20/2029.