Tyler Gross

DRUNK IN SOUTHWEST

RE: “The Happiest Hours” [Feature, March 15], the Mercury’s guide to Portland’s happy hours—conveniently (OR SO WE THOUGHT) arranged by neighborhood.

I’ve enjoyed your paper for many years, but I’m a little disappointed that my neighborhood is always left out of guides to bars and restaurants. Your recent guide was no different. You include North, Northeast, Southeast, Northwest, and downtown, but no “Southwest.” I know downtown is technically Southwest, but what about all the area west of downtown that’s still Portland? This area may not be as hip as Northeast and Southeast, but we’re still part of Portland and we like to drink. I realize many of the bars out here are kind of lame, but when they’re the only thing within stumbling distance, they do the trick. I also realize the reason we live out here is the cheap rent (shhhh... don’t tell anyone), and to keep it that way, we might not want a lot of publicity. But still, it’d be nice if your paper ventured outside the “typical Portland” areas and highlighted some other parts of town.

April


ROMANO RULES

RE: “One Day at a Time: The Week in Review” [March 15], Ann Romano’s weekly rundown of news and gossip! Which usually runs on page five, but last week ran on page four....

Stop the insanity! One Day at a Time does not belong on an even-numbered page! It’s backwards and it grossly confounds my lunch table setting. The first time you did this, I thought it was a mistake; the second time, I was annoyed. Now that it keeps happening, I’d like to officially register my discontent.

Taylor


ANARCHY IN THE PDX

RE: “Need a Pothole Fixed? Maybe a Portland Anarchist Can Help!” [Blogtown, March 13]. Bri Brey’s post was about local anarchists fixing potholes. You heard about it.

How do we report a pothole to the anarchists? And don’t tell me Facebook... you know “THEY” will put me on some list if they see me consorting with anarchists on Facebook.

eprophet

Can’t remember where I read this, but in another city some people would bring attention to a pothole by drawing a penis around it, the way you draw an outline of a murder victim on the sidewalk. Might not work in Portland since we’re so jaded, but it would probably work in a city with more uptight Christians.

Berny5


👏👏👏

RE: “This Just In: Liberals Love Being Told They’re Right” [Blogtown, March 13], Senior Editor Erik Henriksen’s piece about the Trump-era ratings successes of Last Week Tonight with John Oliver, Full Frontal with Samantha Bee, and more.

Thanks for the lecture. :/ Yep, confirmation bias is real. Seeking out like-minded news is diversionary, a solace, and informative, to a degree. However, the dif between Breitbart and Fox News and Last Week Tonight with John Oliver, Seth Meyers’ “A Closer Look” segment, and Full Frontal with Samantha Bee? The latter aren’t hawking a fraud agenda, camouflaging facts, and tarting up the owning class’ antiquated entitlement shite. And bonus—these shows might just motivate peeps to, oh, I don’t know, engage with the wonks who are trying to decimate EVERYTHING. 👏👏👏

G.L. Greenlaw


ONE PUNY HUMAN’S OPINION

RE: “One Hulk’s Opinion: Editorial Opinion from the Incredible Hulk” [Returning Column!, March 15], the latest installment of the Incredible Hulk’s Mercury column.

I really love reading the Hulk’s column. Would it be possible for an entire issue to be written by him?

Houton Bolles

Houton! This Hulk! Hulk not have time for stupid idea! Hulk have LIFE, you know! Hulk busy at day job! Hulk work at Forever 21 in Pioneer Place! Don’t ask Hulk for discount though. (Hulk manager, Hillary, real piece of work.) Hulk also hate-watching Iron Fist on Netflix! UGGGGH, Iron Fist so lame! Why no show for Hulk? Netflix not even ASK Hulk to guest star on Iron Fist! Or Daredevil! Or Jessica Jones! Or Fuller House! That remind Hulk! Hulk got beef with John Stamos! First of all—

Actually, now Hulk think about it, Hulk have LOTS to say! Maybe Hulk write issue soon! Good idea, Houton! Oh! Taylor! Settle down! One Day at Time on page five this week.


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