RE: “Newcomers’ Guide 2017” [Feature, Sept 13], our guide for Portland’s infestation of new residents. Our guide covered how to efficiently and quickly navigate the city (hint: don’t use a car), where to find the best live music, and a few other topics—like Joe Streckert’s “Old Stuff for New Portlanders,” which recommended both safe, tourist-friendly bars (McMenamins) and local dives. “And not a new dive,” wrote Streckert. “Not a carefully constructed dive. Go to a genuine hole in the wall full of video poker and sticky floors.”

Despite living in Portland for over 20 years, I actually enjoyed the Newcomers’ Guide. But I think you should have added a tip to the dive bar part of “Old Stuff for New Portlanders.” When you walk into a real dive bar, the first thing you should do is look around and see what everyone is drinking. If everyone has a tall boy of Hamm’s, don’t order an old fashioned. If everyone is drinking cocktails, don’t ask what IPAs they have on tap. Fit in with your first drink, and you’ll be more likely to engage in a colorful conversation with the local barflies.


Also in the Newcomers’ Guide was “The Newcomer’s Pot Buying Guide,” in which Lester Black helped aspiring potheads learn about the difference between flower, edibles, and concentrates, where to imbibe, and more.

I find myself wondering why you didn’t mention vaping hash oil via pre-loaded cartridges. No prep, totally stealthy, very tasty.



RE: “Did Mac DeMarco Piss His Pants During His Show at the Oregon Zoo on Saturday? [Blogtown, Sept 11], clearly the finest piece of investigative journalism ever published by the Mercury.

When ya gotta go, ya gotta go.


From my perspective beneath the stage, he talked about it, but did not do it. If he actually did, teenaged girls have become much, much more forgiving of the behavior of their idols.

rich bachelor


RE: “Old Town Neighbors Are Fighting a New Homeless Shelter by Citing a Decades-Old Agreement” [News, Sept 13], News Editor Dirk VanderHart’s story about how Old Town Chinatown business owners, fighting a new shelter, are digging up the “no net gain” policy—which began in 1987, and led to the “Clark-Shiels agreement,” which forced developers to “commit to retaining 252 shelter beds within the neighborhood, along with the 1,030 single-room occupancy units at the time. In return, social service providers couldn’t expand operations.” Of the time the agreement was drafted, VanderHart writes, “The tensions that existed then were very much the ones that persist today—businesspeople were pushing for revitalization, while social services feared development would push out needy Portlanders.”

Needy Portlanders? You mean transplant homeless people who come to Portland for the free services.

Portland continues to spend more on homeless, and house more people, every year, yet the number of homeless people keeps increasing. At some point we have to recognize it is a national issue, not something Portland itself is going to solve. Everyone else has a right to live in this city too, without having to worry about their bikes being stolen, their kids picking up or stepping on discarded needles, or all of us being subject to the health hazards of homeless people dumping trash and human waste on our city streets (that then gets washed into our river).


In the face of FlavioSuave’s bone-deep fear of homeless people, rich bachelor’s keen analysis of whether or not Mac DeMarco did, in fact, pee his pants, and eprophet’s cannabis proclivities, we’re giving the Mercury’s letter of the week—and two tickets to the Laurelhurst Theater—to Rev! Simplistic opinions about those less fortunate are a dime a dozen, and potheads rambling about hash oil are on every Portland corner... but a friendly reminder of proper dive bar etiquette is always appreciated.

Letters and comments may be edited for space. Email us at lovenotes@portlandmercury.com.