THURSDAY, DECEMBER 4
9:00 NBC THE OFFICE
Tensions flare over how to spend a $4,000 surplus! (How about 400 Dwight bobblehead dolls?)
9:30 NBC 30 ROCK
Jack gets screwed AGAIN when the G.E.'s CEO (Rip Torn) awakens from his coma.
FRIDAY, DECEMBER 5
9:00 ANI WHALE WARS
Check out this reality series about a whale rescue organization... staffed by a bunch of jerks!
SATURDAY, DECEMBER 6
8:00 CMT HULK HOGAN'S CELEBRITY WRESTLING
Season finale! Four celebs enter the ring... three leave in body bags.
9:00 SCIFI CYCLOPS—Movie
(2008) Another super cheesy SciFi flick, wherein two-eyed Eric Roberts battles a one-eyed freak.
SUNDAY, DECEMBER 7
8:00 CBS THE AMAZING RACE
Season finale! The remaining teams race from Moscow to the finish line in Portland (where no one will really care who won).
9:00 HBO HOUSE OF SADDAM
A four-part biopic of the rise and fall of Saddam Hussein. Features the song, "Spider Hole, Here I Come!"
MONDAY, DECEMBER 8
8:00 BRAVO INSIDE THE ACTORS STUDIO
This week starring hunky Josh "No Country for Old Men" Brolin!
10:00 MTV THE HILLS
In a surprise twist, Heidi marries Spencer and... is she freaking INSANE?!?
TUESDAY, DECEMBER 9
10:00 BIO SHATNER'S RAW NERVE
Bill Shatner interviews ex-porn queen Jenna Jameson. Really, what else do I have to say?
10:00 MTV A DOUBLE SHOT AT LOVE
Season premiere! The contestants learn they will be pursuing bisexual twins, which renews their belief in God.
WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 10
8:00 FOX SECRET MILLIONAIRE
This week, a generous millionaire goes to Utah Mormon country, and can't find a single deserving person. Weird.
8:00 NBC LITTLE SPIRIT: CHRISTMAS IN NEW YORK
A magical sprite gives tours of NYC (which happily bypass Rudy Giuliani).