THURSDAY 12/30

THE ACCUSED, HELLSIDE STRANGLERS, LOPEZ
(Dante's, 1 SW 3rd) For a band that's been defunct for so long, The Accused sure are around a lot all of the sudden. Then again, when you're an aging punk icon who succumbs to the temptation of getting the band back together to relive the glory days, and it actually doesn't end up completely sucking nuts, it may not be too bad an idea to cling to that for a while. So, if you missed them last time, now's your chance to witness the splattercore legends, who are surprisingly spry, along with the queen bitch mascot Martha Splatterhead overseeing the leathered, slam dancing operations. MARJORIE SKINNER

BO DIDDLEY
(Berbati's Pan, 10 SW 3rd) See Music, Pg 15

KOTTONMOUTH KINGS, BIG B, JUDGE D, KINGSPADE, DIRTBALL
(Bossanova, 722 E Burnside) It's hard to believe it's been EIGHT YEARS since Sublime's Bradley Nowell went to the big bro-down in the sky. Even crazier, Orange County's Kottonmouth Kings are STILL humping his leg. They're still carbon-copying his lyrical themes, still milking that sticky-fingered, sun-baked beach-bar cocktail of reggae plus punk plus dumb cargo shorts and wraparound shades. Their big hit was 1998's "Dog's Life" an ode to the Sublimity of surfing and smoking the ganj--all set to doughy, brain-fried white-guy ska. The band's new rec is Fire It Up. If you have it, don't tell anyone. Like kiddie porn, the Kottonmouth Kings are a pleasure best kept hidden. ADAM GNADE

PLUSHIES, THE SATELLITE KINGS, THE PISS SHIVERS
(Tonic Lounge, 3100 NE Sandy Blvd) A quote from www.plushies.com: "Do you love the feeling of plush fur against your skin? Does it make you wet, or make you hard? Do you want to do what our girls did here and attach nice big strap on dildos to their toys, or is rubbing that soft comforting fur against yourself enough to make you climax again and again?" A quote from www.theplushies.com, website of local rockers The Plushies: "The style of music that THE PLUSHIES perform can best be described as Glom Rock, a tub-thumping mixture of hard-glam, punk, metalloid, and indie, with most of the songs featuring tight structures, memorable hooks, and short lengths." Not a lot of crossover there--which is, to be sure, highly unfortunate. JUSTIN WESCOAT SANDERS

POINT JUNCTURE, WA, TONY MORENO, ANDREW KAFFER
(Nocturnal, 1800 E Burnside) Dischordant vocal harmonies, instrumental drones, maraca solos… all the sounds that were codified in '90s indierock have once again found a home in a band that happens to be named after a place--Point Juncture, WA. The only thing cuter than a rock band formed around a vibraphone, is seeing it played by someone who simultaneously juggles a trumpet and a keyboard between choruses. The sonic act is unabashedly referential, producing a nostalgia that is clumsily beautiful. In an era of cyclical retro-rock, perhaps PJWA isn't late for the party--just really early for the next one. MANU BERELLI

A VERY DEAD HORSE, THE PLANTS, ATOLE
(Holocene, 1001 SE Morrison) Joe Haege, singer and guitarist for Portland's beloved progressive indie ensemble 31 Knots, performs tonight under his solo moniker, A Very Dead Horse. In namesake, we're left to assume that perhaps Haege is suggesting a certain sense of retread, but be warned: A Very Dead Horse is in no way, shape, or form, 31 Knots. Instead, Haege explores biting instrumental piano compositions, in the vamping experimental sense--gothic and stark. It's difficult to imagine this tuxedo-tailed sort of classical piano really working in the ADD-heavy confines of Holocene, but I guess that's why they're bringing Atole along. The Las Vegas import has been rather quiet since his relatively recent move, but the performance art-heavy mister Manny is coming out of his shell tonight with a new set of boombox bombast. Also tonight, Point Line Plane's Josh Blanchard introduces us to his spanking new project, The Plants. ZAC PENNINGTON

JASMINE ASH, NOTHING ERROR, DYKERITZ, ONCE IN THE SUN
(Noir, 203 SE Grand) Dykeritz is the project of Ryan Feigh, whose Madison Records puts out local gems like the Snuggle Ups and Modernstate, so it's no surprise that his own project is noteworthy. Borrowing heavily from the pop experimentation that will forever be associated with Ween, the songs contrast nicely with each other, with some light machinery and fun with falsettos. Though they can't quite be credited with inventing their sound, Dykeritz are pretty impressive (not to mention prolific), and they play around town a whole fuck of a lot more than Ween, and at smaller venues. MS

FRIDAY 12/31

BIG ISLAND SHINDIG, BUDS OF MAY
(Conan's Pub, SE 39th & Hawthorne) Billed as a "hillbilly hoedown," this is the show for concertgoers who prefer earthy party hosters to frou-frou champagne toasters. No stranger to holiday hootenannies, the tie-dyed quintet celebrated Big Island Shindig Day on August 14, 2004 in downtown Portland. That tasteful ceremony aside, this relentlessly gleeful group lives for Halloween and New Year's Eve gigs, both of which supply appropriately addled/open-minded audiences for its cosmic-funk roller coasters. Buds of May, a pickin'-and-grinnin' banjo-fueled bluegrass band, will set the raucous rustic mood. ANDREW MILLER

DR. THEOPOLIS, DITTY TWISTERS, THE JOLENES
(Kennedy School, 5736 NE 33rd) Fighting an uphill battle against their regrettable band name, The Ditty Twisters find a way to be fairly rockin'. Their new album Pinata Baby exudes twangy electric drive, led largely by Marie Murphy's powerful, deep vocals. With the over-the-top antics of Dr. Theopolis closing things out, expect an eclectic celebration at the Kennedy School this New Year's Eve. JWS

THE OUT CROWD, DJ ANTON A. NEWCOMBE

(Slabtown, 1033 NW 16th) Tonight offers two sects of the brilliant burn-outs turned cult film stars the Brian Jonestown Massacre--here in the form of Matt Hollywood's the Outcrowd and a DJ set by BJM frontman Anton Newcombe. In this year's critically celebrated (and Newcombe reviled) documentary Dig!, Hollywood comes out looking like the hero (if only by a nose) of the band's bleakest period--in the process revealing just how much his own subtle, sweet brilliance impacted the Massacre. With these reference points in trajectory, the Out Crowd sounds pretty much exactly as you might expect the psyche seeds of the Bay Area giants to birth--which is to say, pretty awesome. ZP

EVERYDAY VICTORY, WATCH IT BURN, HERKEMER, PINEHURST KIDS
(Tonic Lounge, 3100 NE Sandy Blvd) Two sinewy sticks from the family tree of Portland's defunct Tenpin, Everyday Victory and Watch it Burn both appeared on Tonic's rock-heavy New Year's Eve bill last year. Their tunes blend brick-to-the-head riffs with disarming emotional sincerity, making them the perfect groups to give 2004 an indelicate boot with apologetic tears in their eyes. Opening the show are the Pinehurst Kids, who once seemed on their way to alt-radio fame, which would in turn give the group the opportunity to co-mingle uneasily with inane MTV personalities while playing outside in a caustic chill for the Times Square masses. For better or worse, the Kids remain home for the holidays, debuting material that pairs Joe Davis' grizzled snarl with a resurgent dual-guitar attack. AM

FIRST ANNUAL FIR BALL FEATURING WHITE HOT ODYSSEY, DJS PANDER, IZM, EVIL ONE, ANJALI, THE INCREDIBLE KID
(Doug Fir Lounge, 830 E Burnside) Featuring Steve Perry and Jason Moss of the Cherry Poppin' Daddies, White Hot Odyssey are a "glam" band in much the same way that the Daddies were a "swing" band: at best an edgeless recycle of a rather particular musical fashion movement; at worst, a self-conscious parody of the genre they purport to love. Their self-titled debut--released on the same Jive Records subsidiary that put out CPD's records--features a photo of the quintet in a lazy, suburban approximation of glam garb, rocking an unmistakably Mott the Hoople/Alice Cooper sensibility of glitter rock. Which isn't to say that White Hot Odyssey wouldn't necessarily make a reasonable sort of schlocky local party band--it's just that the whole thing seems altogether a little inflated. But maybe that's the point--it is supposed to be glam, after all. ZP

STEVE KIMOCK BAND, FLOWMOTION, MIDNIGHT PARADE!
(Crystal Ballroom, 1332 W Burnside) Capping the calendar with tripped-out flair, the Steve Kimock Band plans to escort 2004 into the obsolescent abyss with a radiant retina-massaging light parade and fire dancing, all on a sparkling crystalline-village stage set. Flowmotion's hirsute funkateers will open the extravaganza and perform African-inspired drum solos during breaks, while strolling performers from the Oregon County Fair will make cameos. All this tops the Colorado New Year's Eve performance Kimock documented on DVD, which was noteworthy mostly for its insanely intricate instrumental flourishes. The musicians encourage fans to bring costumes and drums for optimal enjoyment of the experience; a rare grammatical quirk requires that drums be pronounced "drugs" on this occasion. AM

LIFESAVAS, LIBRETTO, SIREN'S ECHO, DJ KEZ
(Berbati's Pan, 10 SW 3rd) What the fuck is there left to say about Lifesavas, Libretto, and Siren's Echo? I'm not here to cause a rift 'tween Portland's finest--and as triple shot bills go, you could hardly go wrong with any of tonight's contenders--but shit man: we've written about them all so much that at this point we're just repeating ourselves. The moral of this missive? The English language simply doesn't allow an adequate number of adjectives to properly describe just how much you should be at this show. Oh, wait--here's something: Lifesavas are playing with a live band tonightÉ how's that for incentive? ZP

PLAIN JAYNE, ATOM SANE
(Ash Street, 225 SW Ash) Once a New Year's Eve of grit and glam (featuring the Makers, The Lovelies, and the Champagne Cowboys), the Ash Street has, at roughly the last minute, changed the line-up with an about-face--instead ringing in the New Year with the soul-patched and ball-capped Nu-Metal of locals Plain Jayne. An unfortunate switch, for my sake, as I had hoped to apply my fascination with the day-to-day tedium of what it must be like to keep up with the Makers' fashion regime into the form of an insightful "Up & Coming." I guess there's always next time. As it stands, I can hardly think of a more terrifying prospect than welcoming 2005 with Plain Jayne's rendition of "Auld Lange Syne." ZP

ZEKE, BLACKOUT RADIO, THE STIVS, FILTY WHITE TRASH
(Sabala's Mt Tabor, 4811 SE Hawthorne) See Music, Pg 15

SATURDAY 1/1

DANCE IT UP! FEATURING DJ PAULA B, KING FADER
(Berbati's Pan, 10 SW 3rd) Making dance music with more BPM's than the average human can count, Paula B could probably even get my stoned-ass neighbor off the couch and shaking his groove thing. And it's a good thing Paula's got mad skills, because the thought of a dance party at Berbati's is about at appealing to me as a knitting circle in my living room. The space just doesn't fit, and I can't imagine the usual crowd being down--but hey, it's the New Year, and maybe drunken indierockers have resolved to cut a rug. KATIE SHIMER

KNOTTY DISCO
(Doug Fir Lounge, 830 E Burnside) See My, What a Busy Week! Pg 13

SUNDAY 1/2

BATS FROM THE PYRAMIDS OF EGYPT, OTHER MEN MY AGE, KONAMI DEFENSE SYSTEM
(Meow Meow, 320 SE 2nd Ave) Take crystalline power indie pop--MSG-flavored and inoffensive--and super-impose that upon Moog-driven fascinations with New Wave, and you got something of a loose approximation of Bats From The Pyramids of Egypt. A little too clean for the tastes of my dancing shoes, the Bats are, however, more than qualified to move the subtle toes of Portland's indie elite. Also means for applause is the band's ultra-relentlessness--a drive that sees them dropping off a new CD-R nearly EVERY FUCKING TIME they play a show. See--when the week's schedule is tired and thin, sometimes a little shameless self-promotion does work. ZP

MONDAY 1/3 And on the third day, God rested.

TUESDAY 1/4

CERULEAN BLUE, CAT-A-TAC
(Tonic Lounge, 3100 NE Sandy Blvd) Former Washintonians and now locals Cerulean Blue play the music of the tortured youth. It might sound like I'm being snarky when I say that, but in actuality, these boys represent the tortured youth with a lot more flare and intelligence than most. While the singer's voice is decidedly high-pitched and emo-esque, you can tell he's actually got a little soul hiding in there, and the guitars and drums fit together into some addictive melodies. These guys just might have it going on. KS

TAINT QUEER DANCE PARTY FEATURING DJS YEAH YEAH, AUTOMATON, ASTRO, WESLEY
(Goodfoot, 2845 SE Stark) If I were a queer looking for other queers I'd move my ass to Portland because every single night is a banging dance party that practically begs you to get off the couch and meet some new friends (or lovers). And being a non-dancer--or rather, an extremely rare dancer--I can say, you should check this hiphop/new wave/beat heavy night out, because the tight little dancefloor at the Goodfoot is one of the most fun spots in town to show off your fancy footwork. KS

WEDNESDAY 1/5

MAN OF THE YEAR, JACKIE, PUMA FRENZY
(Berbati's Pan,10 SW 3rd) Oh nooooo! Jackie is like that briefly popular girl in high school that was the shit for like an entire semester, and then everyone decided she was a bitch and turned their backs on her. So it goes with former "it" band Jackie, whose derivative wails and fashion plate associates were the toast of the Portland party scene, as well as Kelly's Olympian. Seemingly on the brink of mainstream success, everyone found out that everyone else had secretly been talking shit about them, too, and it was all over. And now it's come to this, their last show. Go, and find out who their other real friends were. Goodnight sweet, beautiful, tragic Jackie. Goodnight. MS