by Adam Gnade

Lydia Lunch

Sat Dec 13

Ash Street

WHAT A BUMMER. Early on, word was Lydia and Glass Candy were gonna play together--as one band. 'Course, that was too good to be true--though the two of them on one bill is coup enough.

Lydia Lunch is sleazy. Everything from her autobiographical fiction to her spoken word and music is dirty and filled with twice more cum-asshole-cock talk than most folks can stomach. But there are messages here. If you can make it through the Penthouse Forum Letters blush stuff, you'll get cannonballs like: "Ladies, don't let your man fuck and run"; "Struggle for female dominance by any means necessary"; and the recurring, "It's okay to kill your abusers."

Glass Candy and the Shattered Theater is sleazy a la Dynasty--the band and the TV show. Singer Ida No is a cold-as-ice Bowie, a superlady of compelling no wave harshness, angularity incarnate. Like Lydia, Glass Candy takes pleasure in the difficult, but tends to make it sound prettier--ugly-pretty in a Blade Runner, 1984, City of Lost Children, Reagan's-guilty-Alzheimer-nightmares kinda way. Corroded, damaged, but sexy and strong.

Combined, Lydia and GC would've been a force of sleaze-nature. They would've sleazed you right outta the club, past the heshers smoking in the alley, and into your closest coke party--head down to some luminescent, white inner-thigh, a hard snort, then sleaze-heaven.

But it is not to be. Glass Candy plays first, and then Lydia reads from her new spoken word rec, Memory and Madness. But maybe next time. Actually, y'know what? Definitely next time. Let's make this happen. I propose a phone-call campaign to both their camps. Inundate them with reasons why, and make it worth their while. Let's get proactive, friends.