I thought your official title was "Editor Enchafed."

I gave you a hug at Wilhelm's Portland Funeral Home open house on memorial day. Don't even try to deny it. You were wandering the mausoleum with a wistful look in your eye. I know who you are old friend, I know who you are.

For quite some time, I would pick up the Mercury hot off the press and scan the articles for my favorite columnists, of which you were number one. I even went to a storytelling event in which you participated solely, to see you in action. And I know I'm not alone in that sentiment. So make haste with the untwisting of your panties.