This never would have happened if I were still alive.

David: Win.

Idea: double-sell the entire cemetery, but put the new stones at the foot of the graves, facing the other way. It'll be two cemeteries in one, all depending on which way you're facing. I know, I know...Americans hate to share. Get over it. Plop the new body in there on top of the old one, place the new stone, and move on. Can't we all just get along?

Alternatively, let's turn Laurelhurst Park into a cemetery!