GOOD MORNING, BLOGTOWN! Hey yo I'm still not a player, but you still a hater. Elevator to the top, hah, see you later. LET'S GO TO PRESS.

In case you missed it, here's your Occupy Portland weekend roundup: Saturday's Bank Transfer Day march/protest was a calm success, protesters chained themselves up in Schrunk Plaza, and apparently the "Real Occupy Portland" is not responsible for the vandalism on a Chase bank. The email claiming responsibility that made the rounds this weekend is apparently a fraud, and adds another juicy plot point to the continuing Occupy PDX soap opera. For a quick wrap up of all the arrests that went down this weekend across the country, check this out.

Well, that's one way to beat your country's (that would be Greece) financial crisis—form a new government.

Meanwhile Italian Minister Silvio Berlusconi says "Screw YOU" to reports that he's stepping down in the face of his country's financial crisis.

Speaking of stepping, two Penn State officials step down after it's discovered they lied to a grand jury in regards to a child sexual abuse investigation involving the school's former assistant football coach. THIS IS A SAD, GROSS STORY.

More "stepping" news: A fourth woman has stepped forward to press sexual harassment charges against Herman Cain—and they won't stop until they reach 999!

Oklahoma can expect aftershocks for weeks and maybe months following Saturday's 5.6 mag shaker.

Hundreds of (annoying) tourists are trapped in an attempt to climb Mount Everest.

Lindsay Lohan goes to jail for 30 days for parole violations, and... oh, she's already out? Time goes SO FAST in Hollywood!

Now here's what's going on in your neck of the woods: Partly sunny with a chance of occasional showers over the next few days with highs in the mid-to-low 50s.

And finally, SNL gives their hilarious take on "Kim Kardashian's Fairytale Divorce"! Ohhhh, rich people. What will you do next?