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Take a good look, kids! Clocks are OVER now!
Take a good look, kids! Clocks are OVER now! Imgorthand

Good Afternoon, Portland... and afternoon it shall stay until the end of time! (HA HA HA), unless I am misunderstanding the new permanent Day Light Savings Time adoption. Let's read about it in THE NEWS.


• There's a hot new proposed two-year contract between the Portland Police Bureau and Downtown Clean & Safe. In it, Clean & Safe would cover 80 percent of the salaries for four officers dedicated to the downtown business area. However, it's also a move that would have taxpayers eventually paying for something previously funded by local businesses. News Editor Alex Zielinski has the story.

• Thanks to an eleventh-hour influx of federal funding, Oregon's emergency rental assistance program will continue to accept applications for an additional week—the new deadline is March 22.

• What were your favorite sexy films at this year's HUMP! Film Festival? Time to reminisce and see if your favorite sexy foodies won. Okay, that was a spoiler. Some sexy foodies won.

• Don't overlook all the luxurious anus licking in this week's Savage Love!


• If confusing disinformation surrounding the Russian Invasion of Ukraine is fogging up your screen, this Think Out Loud interview with Portland-based photojournalist and reporter Justin Yau offers his perspective on the first days of the war and what Yau has been seeing on the ground. Full disclosure that Yau and I have co-bylined several times, frequently for the Mercury.

• Scattered political rumblings about the ineffectual and dangerous impacts of our bi-annual Daylight Savings temporal swap have grown increasingly loud for the past decade, but I honestly never thought anyone would do anything about it. Today the Senate sent forward a proposal to the House, which—if passed to and signed by the President—would make daylight saving time permanent.

• While in no way encouraging this behavior, I am here to report that Submarine Spy Couple is the new wedding theme of 2022.

• Need happy hour plans this week? Then check out the boozy fun of the Mercury’s HIGHBALL—a week of specialty cocktails mixed by the city’s best bartenders… and for only $6 each!

• In closing, here's a fun running gag that resonates with me, all millennials and most Gen Zs on a number of levels 😢 😑.

@rod We don’t want pool tables and a snack drawer. I want mental health days and a 401k (whatever that is) #millennial #work #corporate #employee ♬ Everybody (Backstreet's Back) (Extended Version) - Backstreet Boys