To be fair, though, it does look off the chain. Or off the hook. Or off the velcro. Whatever you young cautions are calling things these days.
I could be a great publicist. That is so easy:

Hi [journalist's name],
You may remember me. We met at a party a few years ago or something.
I was wondering if you've tried those new Cooler Ranch Doritos? Oh SNAP! THAT SHIT IS OFF THE HIZOOK! You should do a write-up on them.
Whoops, didn't mean you, Mecklem. I just made up a random name there.
That's OK, geyser. I'm pretty random sometimes.
Wow. Embarrassing! The agency Universal uses is called Trailer Park
The text of that email had to go through committee to get to your inbox. You should try to appreciate all the hard work their publicists have done to persuade you that their sweet new ride is off the hizzy.
Yeah but you posted it didn't you, Isn't that what they wanted?

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