MAN (BEFORE NOV. 5)
€ Willfully unkempt Elliot Smith/Ryan Adams hair-don't
€ Self-consciously over-utilitarian "Emo" eyeglasses
€ Bland contempt
€ Howard Zinn book (bookmarked with lo-fi, DIY Xeroxed band leaflet)
€ Satchel containing journal of lyrics/musings
€ Clothing embracing blue-collar brand awareness (intellectual distancing from said brand implied but not actually meant)
€ Pegged trousers
€ Working-class footwear
MAN (AFTER NOV. 5)
€ Efficient, Affleck in Sum of All Fears 'do reveals genesis of receding hairline
€ Compensatory goatee
€ Pragmatic, aviator-style bifocals (alternative: Ari Fleischeresque Lennon specs)
€ Smirk (and/or pinch between cheek, gum)
€ Blackberry containing contacts, notes toward future management manifesto, porn
€ High on life, inevitable triumph over squabbling multiculti groupthink
€ Regiment's tie over Oxford shirt
€ Pleats!
€ Discreetly tassled footwear
WOMAN (BEFORE NOV. 5)
€ Bettie Page haircut
€ Again with the clunky specs!
€ Sassy, Rose-McGowan-esque lips
€ "Ironic" Tokyophilic kitty tee
€ Ska skirt
€ Metal lunch box used as purse
€ Un-sensible boots (with "sex-positive" chunk heels)
€ Slightly imperfect midriff proudly revealed (belly piercing optional)
WOMAN (AFTER NOV. 5)
€ Airtight bun
€ Pert, Ainsley Hayes-esque mouth
€ Shoulder pads? You bet!
€ Hand-held phone for electronic bond deal
€ Slightly imperfect hips shamefully hidden in gray business suit
€ Briefcase used as capitalist weapon
€ Sensible shoes (with "business-positive 1-inch heels")
