The president is still the president, after a leisurely and intimate official inauguration attended by his wife and his daughters and his honorary, Obamacare-saving son, Chief Justice John Roberts. And because people really like the idea of crowding into Washington DC in the winter and pretending to watch something on a big screen that's actually happening a mile away, they'll do it all again tomorrow so the world can feel included.

The death of Don't Ask, Don't Tell has hardly ended discrimination against gay service members—thanks to the Defense of Marriage Act and a whole host of other discriminatory federal regulations that painfully and sharply deny gay soldiers—and their spouses—the same rights enjoyed by straight couples.

The "rules" for drone strikes that White House officials are cooking up—a so-called "playbook" that "formalizes" remote-control murder—come with a giant hole: They won't apply to the CIA's attacks on Al-Qaida in Pakistan.

Israel's prime minister is making peace with the country's rightward lurch away from the creation of a meaningful Palestine: "It's very easy to capitulate. I could go back to the impossible-to-defend '67 lines, and divide Jerusalem, and we would get Hamas 400 metres from my home."

Bodies are still turning up, by the dozens, in the aftermath of a bloody raid on an Algerian gas refinery held by Islamists.

Your last trip to Bed Bath & Beyond, as awful as it was, was not the worst ever trip to Bed Bath & Beyond in the history of terrible trips to Bed Bath & Beyond. This is, maybe, the worst trip ever to Bed Bath & Beyond.

The Sellwood Bridge was made to move several feet yesterday. It was impressive.

An (allegedly) drunk driver
plowed his large vehicle ALL THE WAY THROUGH a house in outer Southeast on Friday night and then ran off the house without an apology. The homeowner was beat up, but lived. The house, though, has been "totaled."

An (allegedly) drunk driverran a red light just outside the new car-free zone in Old Town early this morning—smashing into a taxi before one hurtling onto the sidewalk and into a group of pedestrians. One woman on the sidewalk was killed, and another pedestrian was taken to the hospital.

Cats remain inscrutable. Even to scientists. This is news.

Need dough? A doctor at Harvard needs an "adventurous" woman willing to birth a Neanderthal clone.